RMNBlog

A Love Letter to the United Methodist Church

- by Rev. Vicki Flippin, originally posted at Church of the Village, reprinted with permission -

The Rev. Dr. Thomas Ogletree, United Methodist clergy, former seminary dean, Social Ethics professor, and father.

This week, the New York Times published an article about United Methodist pastor, former seminary dean, Social Ethics professor, and father, the Rev. Dr. Thomas Ogletree. Last year, Rev. Ogletree performed the wedding of his son to another man, a chargeable offense in the United Methodist Church. A complaint has been filed against him, which may lead to a church trial. Another clergy colleague and I were also named in the article as United Methodist ministers who have performed same-sex weddings. This is my response.

In 2008 I committed my first act of discrimination in the name of God. A young lesbian couple—members of my church who called me their pastor, parishioners who had welcomed me into their home and hospital rooms for prayer, full participants in the ministry of our community—made an appointment with me. With smiles on their faces, they told me that they had just gotten engaged and wanted me to perform their wedding in their beloved home church. These women were not trying to do anything radical. They were blissfully ignorant of the heated and hurtful battles within the church about whether they were sacred or sinful, family or abomination, beloved or beyond the reach of God’s love. They just wanted to commit to each other before God and church.

I said no. I did what my church asked me to do. I did not agree with it, but I was afraid of losing my job and my church and the work I felt called to do. So I blessed their cake standing next to a justice of the peace in a hotel ballroom, choosing to stand in judgment before my God instead of before my church.

Reason and Experience: United Methodist Resources for Correcting Our Course

For background: read RMN's press release and the New York Times article.

- by Rev. Dr. Thomas W. Ogletree -

As a lifelong United Methodist, an ordained elder in the New York Annual Conference, and a scholar specializing in theological and social ethics, I am profoundly grateful for the efforts of Reconciling Ministries Network (RMN), their affiliate Methodists in New Directions (MIND), and similar organizations throughout the denomination, to foster marriage equality for LGBT persons within United Methodist practices.  Such equality is fully congruent with the inclusive vision of the “Mission and Ministry” of The United Methodist Church (cf. Part III, Sec. VI of the Book of Discipline), though same-sex civil unions and marriages are currently prohibited by Disciplinary rules.  

Throughout most of my career I have served as a professor in theological schools and university-based divinity schools, which included terms as dean at Drew Theological Seminary and Yale University Divinity School.  In these various roles I was a strong advocate for inclusive visions of the Christian mission, embracing issues of race, gender, class, national origin, and sexual orientation.  Given the academic focus of my ministry, I was rarely asked to conduct marriage ceremonies, so I gave little attention to Disciplinary rules that prohibited pastors from celebrating same-sex civil unions or from presiding over same-sex marriage ceremonies in states where they were legal.  However, when my son, Thomas Rimbey  Ogletree, asked me to preside over his wedding to Nicholas William Haddad, I was deeply honored.  There was no way that I could with integrity have declined his request, even though my action was designated as a “chargeable offense” by The United Methodist Discipline (cf. par. 2702).  Tom and Nick are men of maturity, wisdom, and integrity, and their exceptional bonds with each other have enhanced their commitments to foster a more just and inclusive society that serves the well-being of all people.  Performing their wedding was one of the most significant ritual acts of my life as a pastor!

Same-sex couple to wed at RMN convocation

- by Rev. Andy Oliver -

They met while in seminary. “Seeing her was the first time in my life I was taken aback by someone’s presence. I instantly thought who is this woman,” said Mary Ann Kaiser. That was the beginning of a love story between Mary Ann and Annanda—a journey that is leading them to the wedding aisle at Reconciling Ministries Network’s convocation Labor Day weekend in Maryland, where same-sex marriage is legal.

“Choosing to get married isn’t all about us. It is a response to God’s call on our lives to be one,” said Annanda Barclay, second year seminary student currently serving at Central Presbyterian Church in Austin, Texas. “It is a spiritual act. Civil rights are a beautiful thing and should be realized for all couples, but marriage is rooted in Christ’s expression of love. We now get to be a sign to the world of what that love looks like, in our love for each other.”

Jesus Loves Me – A Healing Lullaby

- by Holli Long -

In many ways, it was a typical morning. 

Brothers playing in the sunroom, TV on in the background, a list too long of things to be done.  The daily routine interrupted when a playful hug-and-giggle fest led to an unintended crash and burn.

Out came my “Mommy the Comforter” hat – a hat which I wear all too often withtwo two-year-old boys finding their way in the wide world – as I scooped up the boo-booed boy (the other escaped unscathed), did my best “accidents happen” bit in toddler terms, and brought my hurting little guy up on my lap for some snuggles.

Pulling a little mommy trick out of my bag, I quickly started in with a current favorite melody as we rocked, hoping to ease the tears and sniffles.

Soon, he was calm enough to offer his own suggestion. Timidly lifting his head off my shoulder, he asked,

“Mommy, I like…Jesus Loves Me?”

DOMA and Prop8: Young man seeing visions of marriage equality

- by Jarell Wilson, part 1, part 2 coming after SCOTUS decision in June -

Everyone in the world with access to some form of technology knows that this is the week that the Supreme Court of the United States heard the oral arguments for and against Proposition 8 (Prop 8) and the Defense of Marriage Act (DOMA). We watched as our social media sites turn red in support of the LGBT community, or blue in opposition to marriage equality, or some other variation of the Human Rights Campaign logo to make some sort of political/theological statement.

It reminded me of General Conference in a way – each side claiming God was with them and that the Scriptures clearly supported them; the only difference is that the Supreme Court shouldn’t be considering what the Scriptures have to say at all. The Supreme Court’s job is to see if human rights are being denied to a minority group, because of that minority’s status in our society. No Leviticus or Romans 1 allowed.

DOMA and Prop8: Old man dreaming dreams on marriage equality

- by Rev. Gil Caldwell -

Friends as an "old man who 'dreams dreams'" (Joel), I have written something that I have asked my Truth in Progress colleague to post on our website, but as one who dares to "think out loud", I share the following for your reflection and sharing as you deem appropriate.

The excitement about the Supreme Court's deliberation regarding marriage equality, is in itself  worth noting....Why do I as a 79 year retired African American United Methodist clergyman embody the excitement that many share today? Some reasons:

An Open Letter to GoodNews Magazine: Timely Recognition of the Timeless Will of God

Dear Rev. Renfroe & Lambrecht,

I'm writing in response to the article published in Good News, "A Matter of Interpretation: Engaging Adam Hamilton" which was itself a response to Rev. Hamilton's article in the Washington Post. 

That article left me feeling hopeful because of the respect and perspective you demonstrated while refuting Rev. Hamilton's piece.  It's regrettable the roles of gays & lesbians in the UMC are not fully accepted or agreed upon.  But the communal tone of the ongoing debate is highly encouraging.  You see, I'm new to the United Methodist Church.  After almost 2 years of searching for a congregation I could call home socially and philosophically I came to the UMC.  I'm happy with the choice and for the direction I feel God gave me.  There's a lot of reconciling work to be done on Chicago's south side.  There aren't nearly enough congregations on this side of town where traditionally excluded LGBTQ believers can know that they will be fully supported and embraced openly.  I'm working with my church's reconciling committee here at Morgan Park UMC to let people know that we are such a place.  So, after only being here a few months I find myself engaged in a movement to amend the Book of Discipline and throw open the doors of the church so that the 21st century may come streaming in.  Life really is a box of chocolates. 

My Own Private Vichy

- by Rev. Drew Cottle -

I have been thinking a lot about the impending decisions about “gay marriage” from the Supreme Court this week. There should be one decision made, about California’s Proposition 8 of 2008, on Tuesday. According to the website www.Smartvoter.com, the summary from California’s Secretary of State says that Prop. 8:

•Changes the California Constitution to eliminate the right of same-sex couples to marry in California. 
•Provides that only marriage between a man and a woman is valid or recognized in California. 

Wednesday will bring a decision about the Defense of Marriage Act (DOMA), a federal law that, according to PBS, “(is) designed to give states the right to refuse recognition of a same-sex marriage approved by another state. It also defines marriage as a union between a man and woman for the purposes of federal law.” 

It is a joyful thought to me that both of these decisions may be overturned. I am strongly in favor of inclusion of all Americans in the benefits of American law.

I understand that this might be a surprise to some people. I actually feel a little ashamed for that. There was a time that I was an outspoken advocate of gay and lesbian inclusion in society. I worked at this through inclusion in the United Methodist denomination.  I have described my "bona fides" in an earlier blog post about that time.  I was, I think “the gay issues” guy. I might have even been known as “the gay guy” by some, who knows. 

Married with “Accidental” Children – How Unplanned Parenthood could Define Marriage

- by Holli Long -

Next week, the United States Supreme Court will  hear arguments on two cases regarding marriage equality. The constitutionality of both the Defense of Marriage Act (DOMA), United States v Windsor, and California’s Proposition 8, Hollingsworth v Perry, will be considered.

In both cases, a serious argument against same-sex marriage is that, unlike two members of the opposite sex, two members of the same sex cannot produce unintended offspring.  Yes, you read that right, unintended offspring.

The argument reads as if marriage, by definition, should remain only an option for heterosexual couples so that the financial and social benefits afforded to wedded couples would encourage the parents of unplanned children to marry.  

4 Reasons this Christian Family Supports Marriage Equality

- by Holli Long -

Many of the arguments over same-sex marriage and homosexuality center on religion.  As a religious person who also believes in equality regardless of sexual orientation, this is disheartening.  However, I know that any frustration I may feel regarding this debate pales in comparison to the hurt that many of my LGBT friends have experienced over a lifetime.  It is with great respect for brothers and sisters truly at the heart of this issue that I hope to offer something constructive to the conversation.  What follows are responses to some common “faith” based arguments regarding homosexuality, and four reasons why I feel compelled as a Christian to voice support for marriage equality.

Confronting Homophobia: WWJD

- by Dr. Dorothee Benz -

Two recent stories about courageous individuals confronting religious homophobia provide inspiring–and challenging–examples of refusing to remain silent or complicit when directly confronted by prejudice.

One is the story of the grandmother of a gay man who interrupted an anti-gay sermon to object, and then walked out in protest. The other is the story of a gay man who rebuked a subway preacher, saying “you are full of hate, a false prophet…I’m a man and I’m a good man; I’m a gay man and Jesus loves me. Jesus is love.” The man on the subway was applauded by other riders, but what made it such a brave act was that there was no way he could have known before he spoke up whether he would be supported or attacked for his witness.

Seneca Falls, and Selma, and Stonewall

- by Dorothee Benz, Chair, Methodists in New Directions -

When President Obama said these words last week during his second inaugural address, they heralded a sea change in American politics. By lifting up, if only rhetorically, the 1969 Stonewall Riots in the pantheon of great moments in the freedom struggles of our nation, the president gave the goal of LGBT rights the same moral stature as our historic (though still unfinished) quests for racial justice and gender equality. It was the first time in U.S. history that a president used the word “gay” in an inaugural address.

Our Family Outing: A Memoir of Coming Out and Coming Through, part V, Vows and Honor

Part 5 of 5 with co-authors Joe Cobb and Leigh Anne Taylor who have recently published "Our Family Outing: A Memoir of Coming Out and Coming Through" in which they describe the process of ending a thirteen year marriage and creating a new way of being family in the wake of Joe's coming out.  

Vows and Honor

 These were the words that Joe and I spoke to one another in our wedding on August 10, 1985 as we exchanged rings, “With all that I am, and all that I have, I honor you.”¹

These were the words from sacred scripture that were read in that same service:

As God’s chosen ones, holy and beloved, clothe yourselves with compassion, kindness, humility, meekness, and patience.  Bear with one another and, if anyone has a complaint against another, forgive each other; just as the Lord has forgiven you, so you also must forgive.  Above all, clothe yourselves with love, which binds everything together in perfect harmony.  And let the peace of Christ rule in your hearts, to which indeed you were called in the one body.  And be thankful.   Let the word of Christ dwell in you richly; teach and admonish one another in all wisdom; and with gratitude in your hearts sing psalms, hymns, and spiritual songs to God.  And whatever you do, in word or deed, do everything in the name of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks to God the Father through him.²                                                                                 

 A new vow (Leigh Anne)

The day that Joe and I signed the divorce papers, we met in the formal living room of our house on Herschel road.  While we were talking, a realtor was showing the house to the couple that would ultimately purchase it.  It was awkward to have such an intimate and difficult conversation with strangers wandering through the house, but we did it.  In doing so, we set the course for the next season of our lives, a course that enabled us to write this book ten years later.

Our Family Outing: A Memoir of Coming Out and Coming Through, part II, A Terrible and Liberating Gift

Part 2 of 5 with co-authors Joe Cobb and Leigh Anne Taylor who have recently published "Our Family Outing: A Memoir of Coming Out and Coming Through" in which they describe the process of ending a thirteen year marriage and creating a new way of being family in the wake of Joe's coming out.  

 

 A Terrible and Liberating Gift
- by Joe Cobb - 

On the evening of August 10, 1998, Leigh Anne and I went to dinner and then to Borders Books and Café for our anniversary. 

One year after my initial “coming out” to Leigh Anne, describing my struggle with my sexual orientation, we were still working with a marriage and family therapist to determine the best way to move forward in our relationship.  I was torn by hope and fear.

"Our Family Outing: A Memoir of Coming Out and Coming Through" Part I

Part 1 of 5 with co-authors Joe Cobb and Leigh Anne Taylor who have recently published "Our Family Outing: A Memoir of Coming Out and Coming Through" in which they describe the process of ending a thirteen year marriage and creating a new way of being family in the wake of Joe's coming out.  

What did you learn in the process of Joe’s coming out that has helped you be more successful in your relationships?  

Joe:  To honor myself, and those I share relationships with by being vulnerable, honest, and having integrity.  When I sat down with a therapist and shared my struggle with homosexuality, she answered, "I'm honored that you shared your struggle with me."  Hearing this, I was able to deepen my vulnerability and be honest with Leigh Anne.  By sharing our mutual vulnerability, and honestly communicating with each other, we centered our relationship in integrity.  

Leigh Anne:  When Joe first came out to me, he said, "I don't know if I'm gay or straight and I've been with a man."  After the initial shock, my response was, "I'll stay with you as long as you are in therapy to work it out."  I had an intense emotional reaction, but with prayer and therapy, I was able to avoid making any sudden decisions.  I learned to be patient with and compassionate toward Joe in his painful coming-out process, while at the same time, expecting him to work out his identity issues.  I didn’t blame, but instead took responsibility for working out what I had contributed to the conflict.  Through therapy, I began to understand that as an adult child of an alcoholic, I had learned to be blind to what was right before my eyes.  Breaking out of denial and learning to see things as they really are, was my part of taking responsibility for the conflict in our relationship.

Events of this week compel me to remember a friend, Greg Dell*

- by Rev. Gil Caldwell -

The runner in a relay race is my model for my writing. I seek in my writing to pass the baton of a thought, an observation an idea, a conviction and a suggestion for change, to other runners who will run with my baton in ways I never could. However, my experience has been that the batons I have sought to pass on to others have been taken, most of the time, by people who disagree with me, and
are not timid in their writing responses that sometimes demean and dismiss the thoughts, observations, ideas, convictions and suggestions that I have shared. (I learned long ago as a participant in the Civil Rights Movement to "keep on keeping on" in my activism and my writing, regardless of the naysayers).

But my hope in writing this is that there will be those who read this who will allow what I have written to complement and/or encourage them to be bold, brave and bodacious as they "run" with what I share in this essay.

I write this with GREG DELL in my mind, heart and spirit. Most of us know that Greg Dell as Pastor of Broadway United Methodist Church in Chicago, in 1998 performed a service that publicly celebrated the relationship of two men. Greg was tried and found guilty of "disobedience to the order and Discipline of the United Methodist Church." This happened in 1999, Greg was removed from his appointment to Broadway as punishment. He was re-appointed to Broadway, July 1, 2000 by Bishop Joseph Sprague.

It is becoming clear that the USA and ultimately The United Methodist Church will say "yes" to marriage equality for same sex couples. This week the Dean of the Episcopal, Washington National Cathedral announced that the Cathedral would host same sex marriages. And closer to home, Bishop Sally Dyck in a letter to the clergy and members of the Northern Illinois Annual Conference of The United Methodist Church wrote this in support of the Marriage Equality legislation proposal before the Illinois Legislature:

"While The United Methodist Church holds that the practice of homosexuality is incompatible with Christian teaching, it also holds the teaching and a long tradition (albeit a struggle every inch of the way) of civil rights. Marriage equality is a civil rights issue: it provides for all what is afforded to some."

I have accepted the fact that The United Methodist Church in response to many justice issues is a "tail light" rather than a "headlight". Martin Luther King asked the question; "Why is the church so often a tail light rather than a headlight?" While the US Supreme Court declared racial segregation in public schools unconstitutional in 1954, we as the Methodist Church did not decide that the racially segregated Central Jurisdiction was unbiblical until 1968. We did not ordain women until 1956, even as equality for women was moving forward much before that. And it is now clear that while states and the District of Columbia affirm marriage equality for same sex couples, and the Supreme Court this coming spring is likely to rule that denying same sex couples the right to marry is unconstitutional, we in The UMC are a disconnected caboose on a train that has left the station heading toward full equality for lgbtq persons and same sex couples.

Where does GREG DELL fit in this essay that is too lengthy? While we as The United Methodist Church are "bringing up the rear" on equality for same sex couples, we could become a model in the ways we belatedly affirm those like GREG DELL who have been punished by the denomination for taking seriously their "call" to ministry and their ordination, by their performing services that celebrate the love shared by those in a same sex relationship.

GREG in his ministry believed and believes that the church "rite" of marriage ought be provided "for all", despite the fact in the United Methodist Church today, it is only "afforded to some".

I am suggesting that The United Methodist Church develop a "Ritual of Apology" that embraces GREG DELL  and others. In that Ritual, we as a Church ought say in more than one way, "GREG you were right and we were wrong".

I am discouraged by those who use what they claim is the "authority of Scripture" to justify their prejudices. And, I am also discouraged by those who claim to be "originalists" in their interpretation of the US Constitution as "cover" for their desires to perpetuate injustice and human insensitivity. Therefore, I will not quote the Bible or the Constitution as I conclude. Rather, I will turn to the writings of William Shakespeare!

I will not pretend to be at home in the writings of Shakespeare. I am not sure whether it is the language or the plots or both that confuse me. I have yet to completely understand the characters whose names are, Helena, Lysander, Demetrius, Oberon and Puck in "A Midsummer Nights Dream". But I have found the words spoken by Puck to be helpful and useful as I as a Black, Third generation Methodist have seen the foolishness of racism, sexism and now heterosexism in our denomination. Puck says;

"Lord, what fools these mortals be!"

Our United Methodist Biblical interpretation, Theology, Christology, our ecclesiology nor our polity or General Conference actions or connectionalism, guaranteed appointments, etc. have kept us from being living contradictions of who we claim to be. We acknowledge personally and collectively our sins of comission and omission. But who of us within the denomination are surprised when the "Pucks" beyond the denomination say of us: "What fools these United Methodists be"?

I have taken too long to say that United Methodist "fools" like us cannot erase our history of once punishing persons because of their race or gender, and now because of their sexual orientation and same sex commitment. But, we can as a denomination acknowledge the foolishness of our punitive response to those among us who like GREG DELL, who long ago understood and went about doing ministry in ways we are just beginning to affirm.

I believe that to be "a fool for Christ", is to go public with our recognition of how foolish we have been as we have punished some whom we now recognize were right and we were wrong.

. . .

* I have not spoken to Greg or Jade Dell about the above. "Greg and Jade, my hope is that these words informed by my love and respect for Greg and you Jade, are not inappropriate, nor intrusive."

The Rev. Gilbert H. Caldwell is a retired United Methodist Minister who lives in Asbury Park, N.J. He was active in the Massachusetts unit of the Southern Christian Leadership Conference (SCLC) and participated in the civil-rights movement throughout the nation. In 2000, he, with others, organized the RMN Extension ministry United Methodists of Color for a Fully Inclusive Church (UMOC), an organization committed to the full inclusion of LGBT people in every aspect of church and society. His recent book, Something Within: Works by Rev. Gilbert H. Caldwell is available from Church Within A Church.

Same Sex Marriages Celebrated in Seattle -- United Methodists Sadly Silent

- by Rev. Sanford "Sandy" Brown - 

Seattle was one huge wedding party last weekend. Thanks to official certification of last month's victorious Referendum 74 -- which grants marriage rights regardless of sexual orientation -- hundreds of gay and lesbian couples went to their local county courthouses to get their marriage licenses last week. Then, due to Washington's mandatory three-day waiting period, Sunday marked the first official day of marriage nuptials for gay and lesbian couples.

And the downtown of our city was an extravaganza of same-sex weddings.

Mayor McGinn opened City Hall to any couple who wanted to be married by a judge -- 142 couples took him up on the offer and exchanged their vows that day. After their vows they paraded one at a time down the grand staircase to Fourth Avenue as crowds cheered them on, threw rice and sang love songs. The Symphony Hall down the street was host to a single, grand, combined wedding reception for couples who'd just been married. Lesbian couples who'd been partners for over 30 years stood in line to say their official vows. Gay couples shared their promises and joyfully kissed in the grand lobby of City Hall. Judge Mary Yu (that's her real name) officiated at the first ceremony and dozens of ceremonies afterward. Churches got into it, too. Seattle First Baptist hosted 25 couples who were married simultaneously inside the stained glass majesty of the old, brick, Gothic  structure.

A few blocks away, after worship services, our United Methodist sanctuary was empty and sadly silent. No celebrations. No vows. No lovers making their vows before God.

Why no United Methodist festivities on this historic day for Seattle's gay couples? Simple. Paragraph 2702.1.b of the Book of Discipline forbids us as from sharing in the love. The yoke of an increasingly outdated and draconian church law forces us into silence as the celebrations take place outside our doors. The rule is placed in the Discipline's "chargeable offenses" category, meaning that a UM clergyperson who officiates at a same-sex wedding is comparable to one who engages in sexual misconduct, crime, child abuse, racial discrimination or harassment. In other words, a county judge can legally conduct a same sex marriage in my state, but a UM pastor is somehow not supposed to.

Now, I don't mean to say there aren't United Methodist churches who are hosting gay weddings, or that there aren't UMC pastors who are doing same-sex nuptials. No, many of us are quietly breaking the rules. Many of our UM churches have, in civil-disobedience style, adopted policies that allow same sex weddings in the buildings. We know we're breaking the rules and we don't proudly flaunt it. So the big and public celebrations are at the Lutheran church. Or the Episcopal. Or the UCC. Or the American Baptist. Same sex couples who are in love and want to dedicate their lives to each other need to know that United Methodists have closed doors, closed minds, closed hearts.

While the festivities were happening in Seattle, conservative commentator George Will was on the Sunday talk shows. His opinion on marriage equality?

“Quite literally, the opposition to gay marriage is dying. It's old people.”

At the same time a nationwide poll showed a plurality of Americans support marriage equality. This year marriage equality was not even discussed in the presidential election. The tide has turned on this once-controversial topic, and our denomination looks increasingly backwards in its approach.

The country is discovering that civil rights shouldn't be controversial. I'm so sad to think of United Methodists who are gay and lesbian, who are in love and who want to share their vows before their church families in their church home, only to discover our horse and buggy rules don't cut it in a plug-in hybrid world. 

Our congregation chooses to be faithfully disobedient to the Book of Discipline and instead to follow the Gospel of Love by ignoring Paragraph 2702.1.b. I'm meeting with a gay couple this very evening to plan their ceremony. But I'm still sad that the denomination I love hasn't figured out the truth of Martin Luther King, Jr.'s words. The moral arc of the universe is long, indeed, but it bends toward justice.

 

. . .

Rev. Dr. Sanford “Sandy” Brown is pastor of the First United Methodist Church of Seattle. Prior to his 2008 appointment to this historic congregation, Rev. Brown's ministry included leadership of United Methodist churches in the Pacific Northwest Annual Conference and service as executive director of two local mission agencies, including the Church Council of Greater Seattle. He has served as an elected public school board member, led a high profile battle to overturn an illegal mayoral election, and helped found the Committee to End Homelessness in King County where he directed its advocacy efforts from 2006-2008. Rev. Brown graduated from the University of Washington in 1978 (B.A. History), and earned a master’s degree from Garrett-Evangelical Theological Seminary in 1982 and a Doctor of Ministry from Princeton Theological Seminary in 1997. In 2005 he received the Distinguished Alumnus Award from Garrett-Evangelical. He is married to Dr. Gail Van Norman, a clinical medical ethicist and professor of anesthesiology and has two grown sons. In his spare time he enjoys long-distance walking and advising prospective pilgrims on the Camino de Santiago de Compostela.

When churches cause family to harm one another

- by Rev. Dean Snyder -

As marriage equality is successful in more states, good people also continue to pay a personal price for the forward movement of history. Some families celebrate with great joy the weddings of their gay and lesbian sons and daughters, sisters and brothers. Others refuse to do so.

Here in Washington, DC, where same-gender marriages have been legal since 2010, I would estimate that half of the same-gender weddings of Foundry members and friends have included the pain of some important family member who refused to attend the wedding. Their absence has been particularly painful because it is not only a rejection of the marriage but of the identity of the family member.

At first it seemed odd. These are often parents or siblings who have accepted their family member's partner at holiday celebrations and family events. The family has accepted the relationship but they refuse to accept the marriage.

The objection is always based on the teachings of the family members' church. Always.

The family members manage to accept their loved one's partner into the family, but they cannot bring themselves to participate in a wedding that celebrates the relationship. As a result, family relationships are strained and good people experience rejection.

Let me repeat myself. They always cite the teaching of their church as their reason for not being able to attend the wedding. Without exception.

This is a harsh reminder of the importance of church teaching and why we need to continue to work to change the Book of Discipline.

Sometimes I am tempted to think it doesn't matter what the Book of Discipline says about same-gender relationships. A majority of U.S. delegates voted at the last General Conference to take the statement that "the practice of homosexuality is incompatible with Christian teaching" out of the Book of Discipline. More than a thousand United Methodist clergy have made the commitment to practice marriage equality. Bishop Melvin Talbert continues to invite more clergy to practice biblical obedience by treating all people and their loving, committed relationships equally. A jury of her clergy peers in the Wisconsin Annual Conference chose not to defrock the Rev. Amy DeLong for conducting a same-gender ceremony.

Acceptance of LGBTQ people within the United Methodist Church is largely accomplished at the local level in many parts of the United States. Our denomination seems to be moving toward tolerance of different attitudes in different congregations no matter what the Book of Discipline says.

However, watching the pain of good people whose loved ones refuse to attend their weddings based on church teaching demonstrates that the teaching of the church matters. We cannot allow our Book of Discipline to continue to discriminate against same-gender relationships.

This also is a reminder of the importance of the work of the Reconciling Parents Network of the Reconciling Ministries Network as well as PFLAG and other organizations committed to support their LGBTQ family members.

While I have seen loved ones who communicated disapproval and rejection, I have also witnessed wonderful expressions of love, affirmation, and support. I would not want to suggest that most families members are not supportive. But some aren't and this can be particularly painful on one of the happiest days of someone's life.

When I have walked in Gay Pride parades here in Washington, DC, the groups that have always received the loudest cheers have been PFLAG and other family groups. I suspect this is because so many LGBTQ people have experienced the pain of family rejection.

Strangely, in some families, marriage equality has temporarily heightened the pain. I suppose no forward movement of history is without a price. Having your closest loved ones refuse to attend your wedding can be is a huge personal price to pay.

So we should appreciate those who decide to get married in spite of family disapproval. We should celebrate and applaud family members who choose to support the marriage rather than be persuaded by the teaching of their churches. We should continue to work to change the Book of Discipline.

 

. . .

Dean Snyder has served as senior pastor of Foundry United Methodist in Washington, D.C. since 2002. Foundry Church, the largest Methodist church in Washington, is a congregation committed to social justice and inclusion for all peoples. The congregation’s goals include ending homelessness in Washington, D.C., and ending discrimination against lesbian, gay, bisexual and transgender people with the United Methodist Church and Christianity. Foundry is an ethnically and culturally diverse congregation characterized by dynamic worship and deep engagement. Snyder formerly served as chaplain to Drexel University and as a religious journalist. His articles and essays have been published in dozens of publications, including The Christian Century, Washington Post and Philadelphia Inquirer. He has been interviewed by many news outlets including network news, CNN and The Daily Show.

 

God calls LGBT people... many of them are United Methodist

by Rev. Lauren Kilbourn

A few weeks ago my best friend and partner of two years officially became my wife. This was a joyous occasion for us and for our families (mixed with the social and theological complexities that a same-sex union offers, of course). Tying the knot also meant packing up everything that I owned and moving in to a new place that we can call ours.

As I was unpacking the other day I came across a box of odds and ends taped up and labeled from my last move. Curious about what I had left packaged for three years, I opened it with the awe and wonder of a kid on Christmas morning. What I found left me nearly speechless. This box was like a time capsule of my life. I found art projects and wrapped trinkets from my childhood; old journals and letters from my years as a camp counselor; and three of my favorite Christmas ornaments. Just when I thought I had discovered every item, one was left to be revealed. From the very bottom corner of that deep box I pulled out an old cigar box that I had decorated when I was 15 years old and deemed my memory catcher. What it was in actuality was not so much a memory catcher as a Pandora’s Box. I rarely visit its contents, but when I do, I will spend hours taking out each article and rehashing old memories: the collar that belonged to my first cat; a beaded bracelet that I had stolen from my great-grandmother’s armoire the week after she died; a black and white photograph taken of my mother and me just moments after my birth…

This time as I began to open the box, my eyes went directly to a stack of small slips of paper, bound together with a rubber band. I hesitated briefly. I hadn’t visited that article of the memory catcher since my departure from the United Methodist Church in 2005. Each of these papers represented a vote—yes or no—from my church’s Charge Conference when I began the ordination process.

I remember the night of the vote well. It was one of the first times I had spoken publicly about feeling God’s call to ordained ministry in my life. I felt vulnerable and yet lovingly nested under the wings of a church that I trusted. My heart raced right before they reported their decision, but I was sure that if I was told “no,” then they would help guide me into a lay ministry where I could flourish. That evening after Charge Conference I took from my pocket the slips of paper that they had given me, and basked in the glow of a loving, affirming congregation. “Yes,” the first slip of paper read. “Yes,” read the second and the third and the fourth. “Yes, yes, yes, sí, yes, sí, sí, yes…” 54 people at the meeting, and 54 “yeses” in all.

In earlier years some of these papers were affixed to my bathroom mirror as a daily reminder of God’s call in my life and the church who backed me up. I often looked at them and felt encouraged, remembering the supportive applause of that Charge Conference and the various people who had validated me as I walked the journey to ordained life. When I came out of the closet and was therefore dismissed (unpleasantly so, might I add), it took everything in my power to stack them and bind them with a rubber band, rather than throw them into the fire. Over the course of a week the church that had grown me up, nurtured me, supported me through college and into seminary; the church that taught me about God’s love even when I couldn’t love myself; the church that, much like Gabriel to Mary, announced my call to me and told me how to live into it; that church not only removed me from its ordination process, but began to treat me like I was Judas Iscariot himself.

I examined the stack of paper, bound by that same rubber band, unopened for almost eight years. There were old and deep wounds located among those folds. I remember at one very low point in my life trying to re-visit those papers for comfort and instead rehashing resentment, anger, and sorrow for the institution that took away such great hope it had given me. Yet something inside of me that day told my heart that it was stronger and more resilient than before. I sat down on the floor, and slowly, almost ritualistically, unwound the band. I spread each “yes” out and looked at them with a smile. Though my heart still has a dull ache for the ways that many people treated me after coming out, I can look back now and remember the people who continued to tell me “yes:” The divinity school professor at whose desk I openly wept when a classmate told me I was the kind of person who was ruining the integrity of his church; the visitor from my conference who told me that it was the UMC’s loss when I had to leave; a district superintendent who reminded me that God’s work in my life never changed, even though the church was foolish in their decision-making; the field education supervisor who admired the courage it took to even broach the subject to begin with. The list goes on.

The truth of the matter is that this world is full of people who have actually read and understood and now live out the Gospel commands to love God and love others. Many of them are United Methodist. The truth of the matter is that God fearfully and wonderfully creates lesbian, gay, bisexual, and transgender women and men, and loves them ferociously. Many of them are United Methodist. The truth of the matter is that God calls LGBT and straight people to a life of ordained service. Many of them are United Methodist. And what I have learned and remembered recently is that God also gives us straight (and sometimes closeted LGBT) allies—people who care about, love, and stand up for ALL of God’s children. Many of them are United Methodist.

Stand strong and keep the faith, brothers and sisters.

 

. . .

The Rev. Lauren Kilbourn is an Episcopal Priest in North Carolina. She shares her life with her loving wife and their silly animals, and wouldn’t trade the world to have it any other way.

Transgender Awareness Week

by Deborah Weekley

As Transgender Day of Remembrance 2012 draws near, I am aware that TDOR has expanded into Transgender Awareness Week. This brings more opportunities to further educate the general public and build awareness of the presence and needs of transgender/transsexual persons within society.  I was asked to blog about my experience as the spouse of a transgender man because this is a perspective about which little is written.

In many ways, marriage to a transsexual man is just like being married to any partner. Some days it’s awesome and some days it’s a little not so awesome. In other words life has its ups and downs. Any relationship that is a long term, a through thick and thin kind of relationship, needs to be worked on continually to stay healthy and grow. I am fortunate. The foundation of my relationship with David is based on love and respect. I celebrate him as a person. We have much in common, including a love of God, a sense of calling and deeply held values. We share a love of music, art, nature, gardening, walking, good food, stargazing, ocean watching, etc.

The fact that he transitioned female to male 38+ years ago is almost irrelevant. Most days we do not think about it. It is not irrelevant to some others however, if they know or discover this part of our story. We know this from personal experience. We pass easily in public as a heterosexual couple. I do not think of David as a “former” woman. He is David, my husband, my male heterosexual spouse, my honey, my lover, my guy, my hero, my best friend. I am always shocked when someone might refer to David as “you used to be a woman, right?”

As we packed up to move 3,500+ miles across the country I began to think about how our new neighbors, community members, health professionals, property managers, etc., would treat us if they knew David was a transsexual man!  In Portland, and even the greater Northwest we have been so out since 2009, that most people we interacted with knew our story. I never gave it much thought after the shock of coming out had subsided. I knew who celebrated us and who did not. I felt we had a good support group, supportive, safe medical and dental providers. After the initial months following the sharing of our story I no longer worried much about someone coming at David with a gun during worship. Life had settled into a new normal.  

However, driving and moving across country brought these fears back to the surface.  There were parts of the country in which we did not feel safe. We were grateful for no medical emergencies along the way. We carried antibiotics just in case. When we arrived in Boston and faced locating a new church as well as secular communities,  such as doctors, dentists, shifting from a parsonage to a rental property,  utilities, needing all new services and having all new neighbors, anxiety increased.  I find I am not so eager to tell others our personal story of David’s transition. I want to keep a low profile and avoid hassles. I do not feel like telling our new neighbors. What if they are not friendly, open, and inclusive-folks?  What would happen to us then?  Isn’t it just better to be out on a need to know, basis? 

Less hassle seems to mean less vulnerability. It makes me sad to have to think of these truths. It makes me aware once again that one needs to be prudent in this world. The trip reminded me that being married to a transsexual man brings things to the table that cisgender, heterosexual married couples may not have to think about. I feel very protective of my husband, our privacy, and our lives.

Among transgender partnered couples we are fortunate because David passes so well. We can blend. We are not among those transgender couples that stand out and are often harassed simply for being who they are and loving who they love. Some people risk even their very lives being out in public together and showing any affection for one another. I grieve for this population of people. We do not forget, this is one of the reasons we choose to be “out”, to advocate for and stand with our marginalized population.

So what is it like being married to a transgender clergy man?  It is like being married to a cause!  I am privileged because I am married to such a wonderful person; privileged in that I am able to stand in solidarity with a marginalized population. To be a public face of love and marriage within the transgender community is important because decisions about marriage and equality affect us too.

At the most recent General Conference of The United Methodist Church, I heard many delegates (62%) describe and vote that our love is akin to bestiality, call for us to be stoned to death and lumped us together with our Gay and Lesbian brothers and sisters as those “Incompatible with Christian teachings and therefore unfit to serve”,  ie. even exist!  As long as oppression and prejudice remain, we remain dedicated to the work of advocacy and will continue being public.

My cause is letting people know we exist, that we love each other, and that we are just like any other couple with hopes, dreams, and aspirations. Unlike many couples we live with angst about our future because of David’s gender identity. Will David ever serve another church?  Will our marriage continue to be honored? Will our new communities accept us and support us when they know the whole story? During this 2012 Transgender Awareness Week and Transgender Day of Remembrance, these questions remain to be answered. Living into each new day we will continue to love one another, to speak out, and to live in hope! 

. . .

Deborah Weekley, is the spouse of the Rev. David Weekley. She is a mother of 5 children and grandmother of 6. Deborah is a licensed massage therapist who provides safe space for LGTBQ persons, especially transgender persons, who wish personal healing through bodywork. Deborah was a legislative monitor and blogger for the Common Witness Coalition for the 2012 General Conference. Her hobbies include bead art, paper art, and spiritual drumming.  She has recently contributed to a forthcoming book Hung Jury: Testimonies of Genital Surgery by Transsexual Men, edited by Trystan Cotten, which explores the relationships between transgender men and their partners.

Is The UMC a big tent or a circus?

reprinted with permission from The News Blog of The Pacific Northwest Conference

- by Patrick Scriven -

During its 2012 session, the Pacific Northwest Conference voted overwhelmingly to support the marriage equality bill that was before voters in Washington state on election day. Bishop Grant J. Hagiya embodied the will of the conference by offering his voice to the Washington United for Marriage campaign; speaking with clarity about the importance of religious freedom. With the approval of Referendum 74, United Methodist clergy and congregations have two distinct questions to wrestle with.

First is the question of religious freedom and to whom it belongs. While much of the debate in the public realm has been focused on defining marriage rights, the Pacific Northwest Conference through its legislative action in June, and under the subsequent leadership of its Bishop and others this Fall, has taken a clear stand that no one group is entitled to define marriage for everyone. So the first question we need to answer is this. While faith communities in Washington state are now legally sanctioned to offer marriage rites to same sex couples, do United Methodist clergy and congregations currently have that same religious freedom?

The second question is one of fidelity; to whom or what are United Methodists ultimately accountable to. In a sense, the passing of Referendum 74 rips the proverbial bandaid off of a ecclesiological problem the church hasn’t resolved. Mixed messaging and clashing belief systems leave us with a series of different answers to the question of faithfulness. To name but a few:

Is United Methodist faithfulness to be located in a literalistic reading of the Scriptures that some find simplistic, the latest church growth strategy that some find consumeristic, or a progressive vision of Gospel fidelity that some find heretical?

Each possibility has its champions and detractors but their distinctions are not easily waived away as different facets of the same thing.

 

‘Tears of a Clown’ by Flickr user daybeezho

Those who seek unity within The United Methodist Church speak fondly of the church as a big tent, inclusive of many different opinions and points of view. I’ve always appreciated the metaphor just as I’ve valued those churches that embody it in positive ways. But sometimes, a big tent is just another name for a circus and while I’ve always found them interesting, I’d never turn to a circus for advice or leadership. Preserving unity at any cost runs the risk of leaving us looking like a sad clown; intent on bringing happiness but missing the joyful spirit, and appropriate face paint, to do so.

 

For some, it seems that the legalization of same-sex marriage is the worst thing they could ever imagine. But I pray that United Methodists, on either side of the aisle, see this as a gift from our mission field. When a same gender couple comes to one of our churches we have to own our decision when we turn them away – and vice versa.

For those opposed to marriage equality, this is what one might call a contrast point; an opportunity to share how being United Methodist makes you different from the world. Christians can and should draw such distinctions when they exist, even as we are called to do so with genuine love. As emerging generations continue to see inclusion as a civil right, the onus will fall upon these churches to offer compelling arguments that move past the politics of fear and are clearly distinguishable from homophobic arguments of the past.

Progressive supporters of marriage equality are faced with a gift of another sort. As gay and lesbian couples seek the blessing of our clergy and churches, The Book of Discipline remains an obstacle that threatens retribution; if other United Methodists choose to use it as such. As the government extends to us the religious freedom to act as our conscience moves, supporters will be compelled to decide where their ultimate sense of faithfulness lies; and those opposed will be forced to decide how much freedom and grace they would choose to offer those who disagree with them.

Together the church will decide who they want to be in the coming months. Will we be a big tent filled with people who model humility and grace for a world that can’t often disagree without being disagreeable? Or will the church be revealed as a circus with performers of all sorts but no compelling vision of hope to offer to a increasingly partisan world.

‘Ringmaster’ by Flickr user Thomas Hawk

Or perhaps we’ll rediscover the role of ringmaster, the one who “stage-manages the performance, introduces the various acts, and guides the audience through the entertainment experience 1.” If we envisioned God as ringmaster and the goal of all our actions – love, how might we look more generously at the lion tamers, the high-ropes acrobats, and those people who are foolishly willing to project themselves from a cannon for the sake of the show? Despite all of our protests, the beautifully messy circus act that is The United Methodist Church is not beyond God’s power to make sense of and direct to the benefit of a world in need of healing and hope.

Maybe a circus, with all its discordant acts, is what we are called to be.

 

. . .

Patrick Scriven is a husband who married well, a father of three amazing girls, and a seminary educated lay person working professionally in The Pacific Northwest Conference of The United Methodist Church as Director of Communications and Young People’s Ministries. Read more of his writing at his blog, Holy Tweets, and The News Blog of The Pacific Conference.

Marriage Equality in Maine: Question One

- by Erica Tobey -  

I got married on the first day of fall. After almost an entire year of dreaming, planning, list making, crafting and organizing our day had finally arrived. The day started cold and cloudy, with light rain. We were worried about our hopes to have an outdoor event. However, not long before the ceremony started the clouds parted and sun began to shine. Many wedding guests marveled at the sight of a flock of geese taking off right before the procession over the stage where the ceremony took place. I imagine it to be something you would expect to see in a movie, a sign that the occasion was blessed.

I walked toward the stage to the sounds of piano and cello being played live from the stage. As I passed my friends and family who had gathered to witness our celebration of love I smiled, and held back tears of gratitude. I met my love at the bottom of the stairs and we held hands as we walked up to the stage, where we joined some of our closest friends, and three incredible pastors.

The ceremony was exactly what we planned it to be. Each detail carefully chosen to exemplify our love and our personalities. There were words of welcome, and a prayer. There was a beautiful solo. There was a community response in which all 160 guests stood up and voiced their support for us as we started this new phase in our relationship. It was powerful. There were ribbons and rings and self written vows. There was scripture and some amazing remarks by our pastors including a retelling of how our relationship had evolved. There was a proclamation that we would be together forever, and right before the blessing there was a kiss. Following the ceremony we celebrated with a BBQ complete with local meats and veggie burgers, lawn games, and a great little band. Many guests proclaimed that it was the most beautiful, meaningful wedding ceremony they had ever attended. Our hearts were full of love.

Tomorrow, the state of Maine will vote on whether the state should legally recognize marriages such as ours. You see, I am a woman, who married another woman. We had a lovely, amazing, beautiful ceremony, which was really important to us, but legally, my wife and I are roommates. If, God forbid, something were to happen to one of us we are not guaranteed hospital visits with one another. We cannot inherit each others property. We cannot file joint taxes. When we have children the ramifications of not being legally married multiply. There are hundreds of rights that married couples have (they probably don't even realize it) that my wife and I don't have.

The state of Maine can vote next week to give me those rights, to strengthen and protect my family, this marriage that is already very real. I don't need a marriage certificate to validate my relationship, but it would be nice. Same-sex marriages ARE happening, and will continue to happen regardless of how the state of Maine votes on Tuesday. People will continue to commit themselves to spend their lives with the person they love. They will stand up in front of their family and friends and declare that love. Same-sex couples will continue to have children, and raise families. That cannot be taken away. I am just hoping that when voters in the state of Maine go to the polls they will stand up and say " Your love is real, and strong and good, and we value your place in our community," just like our friends and family members did on the first day of fall.

. . .

Biblical Obedience to the Higher Law of Love

By Ann Craig, Founder of Craig Media Action

On April 12, 1963 two Methodist Bishops issued a public statement requesting that the Rev. Martin Luther King Jr. end the demonstrations for racial justice in Birmingham. Rev. Gil Caldwell sees this same dynamic playing out again today in the effort by some clergy to censure Bishop Melvin G. Talbert.

At the close of General conference, Bishop Talbert made history when he declared the prohibitions and condemnations of LGBT people “immoral and unjust”:

I stand before you here this afternoon and I declare that God has already settled this matter: all human beings are created in the image of God. There are no exceptions, no exclusions. We belong to the family of God. At the same time, I declare to you that the derogatory language and restrictive laws in the Book of Discipline are immoral, and unjust and no longer deserve our loyalty and obedience.

In response, 70 conservative United Methodists wrote a letter to the United Methodist Council of Bishops, in August, demanding censure of Bishop Talbert; they claimed he went against the Book of Discipline. But the tide has turned and people are standing up.

The Rev. Caldwell wrote a powerful commentary in support of Bishop Talbert and compared the 70 to the Methodist bishops and pastors in the 1960’s who called for bishops, Black pastors and the churches to reject the leadership of Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr. Dr. King responded with his letter Letter From a Birmingham Jail:

You express a great deal of anxiety over our willingness to break laws. This is certainly a legitimate concern. Since we so diligently urge people to obey the Supreme Court's decision of 1954 outlawing segregation in the public schools, it is rather strange and paradoxical to find us consciously breaking laws. One may well ask, "How can you advocate breaking some laws and obeying others?" The answer is found in the fact that there are two types of laws: there are just laws, and there are unjust laws. I would agree with St. Augustine that "An unjust law is no law at all."

Faithful America launched a massive sign-on campaign and garnered 14,000 signers who stand with Bishop Talbert and called on the Bishops to support biblical obedience to the Gospel. Black Methodists for Church Renewal (BMCR)  went on record in support of Bishop Talbert. The Advocate, an LGBT publication, picked up the story and GLAAD wrote a great blog in support of Bishop Talbert.

This movement of the Spirit is of biblical proportions and is faithful to the Gospel. When religious leaders in Jesus’ day heard the Gospel, they wanted to squash it—but one wise sage said, “If this movement is of human origin, it will destroy itself. But if it comes from God, you will not be able to destroy it; you may even find yourselves fighting against God.” (Acts 5:38-39)

This movement is about love; it is about Jesus who died for ALL, not just for some. The curtain has been torn, the doors are open and the Spirit is moving. No matter how many setbacks we face, we are loved, we are faithful and we are moving forward.

 

Craig is the Founder of Craig Media Action.

Caldwell is a retired United Methodist pastor. He was part of the Southern Christian Leadership Conference in Massachusetts and participated in the civil-rights movement throughout the nation. He was the co-founder of United Methodists of Color for a Fully Inclusive Church, is working on the documentary Truth in Progress, and published his book, Something Within, through Church Within a Church. He is a national board member of PFLAG, Parents, Families and Friends of Lesbians and Gays.

Who's Getting Married?

Biblical Obediance After GC 2012

By Carol Waymack

“Who's getting married?" That was the near unanimous question folks at the Greenwood Car Show in Seattle asked as several of our church's senior members handed them a piece of "wedding cake." "Everyone," we replied, "Everyone who wants to. That's why our church wants you to support Referendum 74." 

Like many who attended General Conference 2012, we came home feeling pretty battered, exhausted and angry. Perhaps we had hoped for too much. Perhaps we had done too little. Perhaps we had not been as loving as grace would have us be to those with whom we disagree. No. We did what was right, worked as hard as we could and loved as much as we could. And in Washington State, which comprises most of the Pacific Northwest Annual Conference, there was lots of support to help us heal. Our AC's overwhelming vote to support Referendum 74, the statewide law guaranteeing marriage equality, was affirming and healing. The AC also passed overwhelmingly, a measure calling for churches and pastors to be "Biblically obedient" by offering full civil right to GLBT persons and by offering "the ministries and sacraments of the church to all persons on an equal basis". 

So, how do we as a small congregation live into this "Biblical Obedience"? How can we support Referendum 74? 

At Woodland Park UMC in Seattle, we served wedding cake to over 900 people at the Greenwood Car Show to make a stance. This car show typically draws a crowd of about 200,000 car enthusiasts, extending for 1.5 miles along Greenwood Avenue, including right in front of our church. People come from all around and represent a very diverse cross section of Western Washington. Decorated with two plastic brides and lots of frosting, these cakes were offered in very small pieces, for free, to those who agreed with us and to the few who argued with us. We used this brief moment with folks to make it clear that our church wants to celebrate all kinds of marriage and to welcome all kinds of people. 

Additionally, we offered tables and chairs for folks to sit and rest for a while, perhaps eat and for kids to color. In this area, we played continuously the excellent Drew Emery film Inlaws and Outlaws, a film depicting all kinds of marriage. Another viewing of this film on August 14 is scheduled in our fellowship hall, with the producer present and time for discussion of what marriage equality means to all of us and with popcorn.

We think this is Biblically obedient.

2012 Annual Conference Reports

Cal-Nevada Annual Conference

The Cal Nevada Annual Conference held a Conference Committee on Reconciliation luncheon.  The theme of the lunch was "Where Do We Go From Here?"  We invited a panel of five people who attended General Conference to provide their thoughts on "where do we go from here" after General Conference.  There was a great variety of thoughts about General Conference.  The similarity was that the reconciling movement did not gain any ground but we did not lose any ground either.  There were almost 100 people in attendance.

Legislatively we passed two main pieces of legislation.  One was called "We Will Not Be Silent" and the other was called "A Study Committee for an Inclusive Conference".  Both passed overwhelmingly in committee and was put on the Consent Calendar.  The Study Committee for an Inclusive Conference was also passed in the New York Annual Conference.  There was also a "Do No Harm" Covenant, similar to the one passed in Iowa.  The covenant was brought up as a point of personal privilege because it would have been ruled out of order if we tried to get it though committee.  

Detroit

The Detroit Annual Conference has witnessed a turning of the tide and it began in 2011 with the election of 6 progressive candidates to General Conference 2012. In 2007, that would have never happened.

At Annual Conference 2012, there were two resolutions related to LGBT outreach. The first one was a call for the wearing of rainbow stoles, crosses, ribbons or any symbols thereof to cease and desist. Three congregations were singled out in the resolution: Detroit Central, Ann Arbor First and the Wesley Foundation at the University of Michigan. This resolution was withdrawn before legislative sessions convened. The second resolution called for all reconciling activities to cease, all MFSA activities to cease and essentially was asking the Bishop to micro-manage three congregations - once again, the three mentioned in the previous sentence. The recommendation from the legislative session was "Non-Concurrence by a vote of 41-29. When the resolution came to the floor for debate, there were two speeches for concurrence with the legislative session's recommendation and only one against. The vote of the conference was concurrence with the legislative recommendation and the vote was very close to 3 to 1. This was a HUGE victory for the Detroit Annual Conference.

Perhaps the most significant thing that happened at Annual Conference 2012 was a prayer circle that took place at the end of the General Conference 2012 report. Rev. Jeff Nelson, senior pastor at Redford Aldersgate and one of our biggest allies, asked the Bishop for a moment of personal privilege. At the mic, he stated that "incredible amounts of harm have been thrust upon our LGBTQ brothers and sisters" because of actions and statements on the floor of General Conference. He asked both LGBTQ brothers and sisters as well as allies to come forward and to form a prayer circle to specifically pray for "No More Harm"  and to stand in unity with our LGBTQ brothers and sisters in their quest for change in the UMC. 145 people came forward. If you consider the delegation to Annual Conference to be around 520 - that prayer circle constituted 30% of the conference body - both clergy and lay. Another HUGE victory for Detroit Annual Conference as that would never have happened even as late as 2010. We ask for continued prayers for Detroit Annual Conference as we continue to break down those barriers to full inclusion.

- George Jonte

Illinois Great Rivers

When I first heard about the concept of a “reconciling church,” probably about 1997, I thought it was a “no-brainer.”  How could my church, Wesley UMC in Urbana, Illinois, not embrace what seemed to me to be a movement that spoke to the heart of Christianity, and the Methodist Church (later professed to be a place of “Open Hearts, Open Minds, Open Doors”)?!

So I jumped into what turned out to be an unexpectedly hurtful struggle, not only within my church, but across our Conference, and ultimately the denomination. 

Fifteen years into the journey, with a church task force (“Reconciling,” then “Inclusiveness”),  a Conference-wide ad hoc group (RUMI:  Reconciling Uniting Methodists of Illinois),  several “affirming” events, workshops, and studies behind me, I can report this:

At the 2012 Illinois Great Rivers Annual Conference, the RUMI breakfast was attended by 40 supporters, seekers, and questioners. This was probably the 7^th or 8^th  year we have held such an event (previously a lunch, but changed this year to avoid conflict with the Social Justice meal which was attended by many like-minded persons).  At that breakfast, we heard a powerful witness from two members of the Iowa AC who have signed the “Do No Harm” Covenant. Several persons who attended General Conference, both as delegates and non-delegates, spoke of their experiences there, and although there were disappointments, there was some optimism for change. The Rev. Sara Isbell, wearing this year’s stole from the Parents Reconciling Network, said that doing so is like a “secret handshake,” and she later wrote of the positive effect of that witness, in opening conversation and trust.

For several years we have had a visible presence at our AC, wearing multi-colored stoles as a witness to the many who have been excluded from the UMC because of their sexual identity. We have also worn aqua (“water-colored”) shirts to support the statement that “we were baptized too” – an image that came from the Cincinnati General Conference. These relatively quiet, non-confrontational actions were not lost on those who oppose an open, inclusive church, and they also served to send signals to those who needed a safe ear. “Ally” and rainbow triangle buttons, as well as rainbow ribbons have also been easy ways to provide witness.

Another powerful witness has been an annual display from the Shower of Stoles Project. Although we have not been able to exhibit the display in a place that would be visible to most of the Conference attendees, it has been a source of inspiration to those who have come to our RUMI events, and this year we were able to also display the stoles at the Social Justice meal, reaching a larger group.

RMN, Reconciling Ministries Network, has been a consistent source of inspiration, support, and guidance for us, providing speakers, workshop leaders, and literature (which we always display at our AC events, even though we cannot have a display table in the exhibit hall). Several of us have been privileged to attend the biennial “Convocations”, which are also life-changing.

The journey is not complete, but we have traveled a fair distance, and though sometimes weary, have gathered many along the way.

- Jean Peters

Indiana

This was the fourth annual conference of the Indiana Conference.  This was our first year at the Convention Center. It is HUGE and there was a lot going on (Indiana Republican Convention). We had and 8’ table in a 10’ booth. Although we have been at the previous conferences, about half of those who stopped were not aware of what the Book of Discipline says regarding LGBT persons. Many, who did know about us, thanked us for being there. Our table was decorated with a variety of stoles, a fish bowl filled with Pepperidge Farm Colored Fish. Besides our literature we had invitations from various churches of related events.

Friday evening, we had our annual dinner at Broadway UMC, which is a short distance from downtown.  The UMW prepared a delicious meal for us. We were pleased to have 64 in attendance. There were a lot of other events going on at the same time. We had great time of fellowship and an inspiring message by Rev. Dr. Rachel Metheny, Assoc. Pastor of Broadway. Rev. Mike Mathers, Senior Pastor, also shared a greeting. 

Saturday was an Indianapolis Pride event. Three of the Indianapolis UMC churches had booths at the event, and two of the churches were in the parade. Broadway UMC wore purpled t-shirts with “I am more than what you see” on them. They also had a convertible in the parade with one of Indianapolis’ promenade citizens riding in it. She is a member of Broadway UMC and has received recognition for her service to HIV persons.

2013 conference will also be at the Convention Center; we plan to have greater witness then.

- Marlene Crowder

Minnesota

The 2012 Minnesota Annual Conference met in St. Cloud, Minnesota May 30 to June 1st. United Methodists for Marriage Equality, the Retired Reconciling Clergy Caucus, and over 14 Reconciling Churches brought legislation to oppose the amendment to the Minnesota Constitution to define marriage as one man and one woman. We came to conference with several speakers prepared to discuss this petition. One of the traditionally conservative District Superintendents moved that we not debate this issue and just vote. The debate was closed on a nearly unanimous vote. On paper ballot we voted to oppose the amendment 70% to 30%.  This is the greatest percentage of support for lesbian, gay, bisexual and transgender legislation at any Minnesota Annual Conference session.

- Rev. Walter Lockhart

Mississippi

In Mississippi, we had a good pre-conference gathering (about 35 folks) at our house with Steve Clunn of MFSA giving us an overview of what happened at GC and where progressive United Methodists are hoping to go from here. This year we reserved a display table for MFSA which included a great deal of materials from RMN. We were placed in the main exhibit hall right across from the women's restroom so we were quite visible -- much more visible than last year. The tone of AC this year was rather calm – we didn’t feel led to put forth any kind of legislation to expose the un-Christ-like decisions of GC. Rather, we focused on being present for any who wanted to hear our stories and wished to gather information about social justice within and without the Church, while showing our hospitality to all by giving out free bottles of water to anyone who asked.

We had folks that came by and spoke of either having a gay child or working in education. All the brochures from the Parents Reconciling Network were taken - with one educator saying she planned to make copies of them to provide others. The most moving visits were with parents - most came when no one else was at the table and shared a little of their struggle - saying they needed to learn/understand more. I thanked them for wanting to learn more. I was able to hear them and honor their struggle out of compassion for my own mother’s journey in accepting my sexual orientation. One woman spoke of her fear that her gay step-son is leaving faith altogether and how she used to be able to say the United Methodist Church would welcome him but now she doesn't think she can say that. When I found out her step-son lives in another state I was able to tell her about a Reconciling Congregation there. My ability to do that is not lost on me when I realize there are no congregations in MS yet that are welcoming enough to be official about it. I truly hope that changes this year. 

We got thanks and hugs from folks (I don't remember getting hugs last year), and it just felt like they left us feeling encouraged. I even had one man come by to say while he doesn't agree with some of what we say, he was very glad we were there. As the conference was coming to a close with the ordination service about to begin, I “just happened” (does anything “just happen” with God around?) to be in the right place at the right time - they needed more ushers to hand out programs. I volunteered and proudly wore my rainbow stole and buttons as I greeted folks and passed out programs!! And in that closing service, I heard God’s call to all of us as we sang “The Summons” --

Will you come and follow me if I but call your name?

Will you go where you don't know and never be the same?
Will you let my love be shown? Will you let my name be known,
will you let my life be grown in you and you in me? …

Will you love the "you" you hide if I but call your name?
Will you quell the fear inside and never be the same?
Will you use the faith you've found to reshape the world around,
through my sight and touch and sound in you and you in me?

- Renee Sappington

New York

The New York Annual Conference (NYAC) meets annually to set policy. It is the one time every year that representatives from every congregation throughout the conference come together and is thus a crucial forum for our witness against the church’s ongoing exclusion of God’s LGBT children.

2012 was a breakthrough year for MIND at annual conference -- LGBT people were named and included from the stage of annual conference; the harm done us at General Conference was acknowledged; the dean of the cabinet asserted in his report that churches are strengthened when they welcome LGBT people; Bishop Sally Dyck held up one of our blue armbands during her ordination sermon; Rev. Amy DeLong gave a powerful speech at the MIND lunch; and we passed a significant piece of legislation.

See a full report of MIND’s witness at http://www.mindny.org/mind-initiatives/annual-conference-witness-2012/

- Methodists In New Directions (MIND)

North Carolina

The Reconciling United Methodists of North Carolina joined with the local chapter of the Methodist Federation for Social Action (MFSA) in exhibiting at the North Carolina Annual Conference in Raleigh, June 13-26. Our RUM table was adjacent to the MFSA table as we shared resources and experiences with attendees. We had a very visible location and were proud to be a part of conference again. A resolution to delete funds for the North Carolina Council of Churches was defeated. Bishop Alfred G. Gwinn, Jr. presided over his last conference as he announced his retirement. At the Southeast Jurisdictional Conference in July, Bishop Hope Morgan Ward was announced as his successor. We have hopes of positive movement forward under her leadership. Next year, NC Annual Conference will be located in Greenville, North Carolina. 

Rev. Laurie Hays Coffman presided over a dinner meeting and worship service held at Fairmont UMC on June 14th that drew about 50 conference attendees even though it was some distance from the Raleigh Convention Center. RMN Board Member Rev. Dr. Gayle Felton gave a summary of the proceedings at General Conference. This dinner meeting and worship service served as a way for our members and supporters to voice their opinions, concerns as well as pains due to the events at General Conference. It was also meant to be a service that would be uplifitng in order to help all of us move forward in a peaceful way and know that God is moving our church in God's time. It was a wonderful time together to fellowship. 

North Georgia

The RMN witness at the 2012 North Georgia Annual Conference had a focus of community, awareness, information, and strategy for inclusion.  This was my second AC, having been a delegate in 2011 and now again in 2012.

Our RMN table was in a better location this year than 2011. Last year we ran out of the PRN information pamphlet “When Your Child is Gay” at the RMN table.  This year we printed an additional 50 copies of all materials supplied in the RMN AC box … and we gave away more than half of these extra copies. New this year at the table were rainbow colored lanyards that were given away. We exchanged the standard conference lanyard with the rainbow lanyard for 140 delegates, explaining the inclusion significance of wearing the rainbow lanyard to each delegate as we helped them put the lanyard on. The lanyards provided a sense of community and a visible witness each day. Speakers came to the AC podium each day in their rainbow lanyard. We had two new volunteers help staff the RMN table this year.

Our AC day two witness included a silent witness. Six brave volunteers carried messages for LGBT inclusion in our silent silhouette witness, similar to the General Conference witness. Two other volunteers stood with us in support. As the day two session ended, the volunteers stood on the sidewalk as delegates walked by to their parking garage, hotel, or restaurant. Volunteers received hugs, positive comments and gestures of approval from many delegates. This witness had been planned for lunch on day two, but as volunteers headed to their positions at lunch time, conference security would not allow volunteers to enter the conference center and police said a permit was required for the witness outside the conference center. The police were helpful obtaining the permit used for our day two session ending witness.

By the end of day two, the few who had rainbow stoles were wearing them along with their rainbow lanyard. I estimate 12 to 15 delegates with stoles. I was able to wear my stole and lanyard as I gave a two minute talk about Leadership UMC from the AC podium during the day three afternoon session. Many delegates asked where they could obtain a stole; unfortunately we had none to give. We hope to have stoles for the 2013 conference.

Our AC day three witness included our second annual RMN luncheon. The luncheon included Rev. Christina Wright discussing the planned path forward for RMN at the grassroots level. Featured speakers also included Rev. James Cantrell and Rev. Beth LaRocca-Pitts, both of whom were North Georgia delegates to General Conference. Jim and Beth reflected on General Conference and discussed strategy for inclusion in the UMC given the growing central conference. Our luncheon count was 48 this year, approximately double the 2011 attendance. Donations to RMN of $225 were given at the luncheon.

- Giselle Lawn

Oregon-Idaho

Oregon-Idaho Reconciling United Methodists (OI RUMs) linked arms with our wonderful MFSA Chapter to open our Annual Conference session (unofficially yet enthusiastically) with a Coffee House, featuring stories and songs of justice and love -- especially reflections on General Conference 2012 -- and free coffee and snacks.  This second-time event is rapidly becoming a tradition (we doubled our room size from 2011) to kick off AC the evening before it officially convenes.

Significant actions include passage of two legislative items:  One is an action recommending that every congregation adopt a statement that specifically welcomes people of all sexual orientations and gender identities.  We offer resources for this initiative from the RMN and from our group and will continue to seek ways to engage individual congregations in conversation and action.  The other, a resolution that even though "we are not of one mind" (amendment by a conservative brother), we agree with Bishop Talbert's May 2012 statement about derogatory language in the Discipline being immoral and unjust and not deserving of our loyalty and obedience and that we will work toward the day of repentance and reform when the inclusive gospel is truly lived out. We also created a statement of “Do No Harm” (based on Iowa’s statement) that clergy and laity alike were encouraged to sign and to take back to their congregations to gather further signatures. We are approaching 200 clergy and lay signatures as they are still coming in.

Our laity workshop featured the film of the Rev. Amy DeLong's dynamic sermon at Sing a New Song and discussion with General Conference lay delegate Jan Nelson about where we go from here.  Our Ministry Marketplace display (which is open and attended for the duration of Annual Conference) featured three 8-foot tables with RMN and our own literature plus a 9x12 image from each Reconciling congregation and campus ministry in our Conference.  One of the tables is reserved for our Parents Reconciling Network in a space suitable for confidential conversations which always occur.

‘twas a blessed session!

- Deborah Maria

Southwest Texas

In the short time between the General Conference in Tampa ending in May and our Annual Conference in June, the SWTX Reconciling Ministries Team, the Austin chapter of MFSA and other like-minded folks, both clergy and laity, joined together to form the “Love Your Neighbor” Fellowship. Our AC had not planned any response to GC. Working to address this need, members of “Love Your Neighbor” organized several events at our Southwest Texas Annual Conference in June, creating spaces to talk and witness about the harm done by our church’s exclusive policies.

We had a well-staffed vendor booth which became our compound (thanks to local MFSA & RM Team). We had a Shower of Stoles on display, which attracted much interest (http://www.welcomingresources.org/sosphistory.htm) We distributed over 150 rainbow stoles, along with educational literature. We talked to delegates, many of whom expressed gratitude for our presence. A communion of lament & hope was held for those in need of healing, as well as a dinner off-site for those who needed to gather with others to discuss and process GC disappointments. A copy of the Hamilton-Slaughter amendment (with an added prologue) was turned into a petition, and distributed to delegates. The petition received almost 100 signatures.

Over 185 attended the 2nd annual Peace & Justice Luncheon, organized by local MFSA chapter, where we shared a Tex-Mex meal and listened to the prophetic words of Audrey Krumbach from RMN and Jim Winkler, General Secretary, Board of Church and Society.

At the start the afternoon business session during which Jeff spoke on Saturday, June 9th, we had arranged (with consent of AC leadership) a lighting of a peace candle by Rev. Sid Hall, with an inclusive liturgy read by lay delegate Brian Heymans about LGBT equality. During the entire business session, silent witnesses were in a line at the back of the hall holding signs, peaceably gathered, not blocking any exits. Most of the delegates walked past us as they entered and exited the business session, with many smiling at our signs and giving words of encouragement. The GC report was given during the second half of this business session. Jeff’s point of privilege was granted by Bishop Dorff at the end of the GC report, allowing Jeff 3 minutes to speak. Bishop Dorff then led the hall in prayer and closed the session.

Many were engaging in conversations about the importance of inclusivity at our AC this year. Many in our conference are working to help our church welcome ALL to God’s table. For a full report visit the group’s website: http://swtxrmteam.wordpress.com/2012/06/19/southwest-texas-annual-conference-2012-overview-5/

You can read more about these activities here:
http://swtmfsa.wordpress.com/2012/06/14/witnessing-do-no-harm/

Liturgy: http://swtxrmteam.wordpress.com/2012/06/19/southwest-texas-annual-conference-2012-update-lgbt-liturgy-2/

Jeff’s point of privilege: http://swtxrmteam.wordpress.com/2012/06/12/southwest-texas-annual-conference-2012-jeffs-point-of-privilege/

- Joy Butler

Tennessee

The Holy Spirit continues to move in the Tennessee Conference! We had a great time together at Annual Conference – passing out more and more reconciling stoles each year. The stoles were all over the conference, on people on the stage up front to voting members. We also hosted our Second Annual dinner hosted by Nashville Area Reconciling Methodists (NARM) and the TN Clergy for Inclusion. Bishop Melvin Talbert and his wife joined us to give us hope and strength for the journey ahead. Over 100 people joined together to share in fellowship and the good words of a strong ally for justice in our church. The most exciting part of Annual Conference was that anti-bullying legislation that NARM and TN Clergy for Inclusion wrote passed! This was the first legislation ever written by the groups, and it reminded us that we do stand on common ground with many who believe in God's grace extending to all. As someone who was disheartened at many points at General Conference, it was a joy to come back home to my community and be reminded that God continues to declare God’s inclusive love, even in the Bible Belt of the South. Thanks be to God!

- Laura Rossbert

Western North Carolina

During the Western NC Annual Conference in June of this year, the 3^rd annual RMN Chapel Service was held on Thurs. evening in the beautiful chapel next to Stuart Auditorium at Lake Junaluska, NC.   The Rev. Josh Noblitt led the powerful worship service along with members from Green St. UMC in Winston Salem, WNCUMC’s only Reconciling Ministries Congregation, who provided soulful and inspiring music that kept attendees on their feet for most of the service.  Approximately 150 people attended the service.  During the time of sharing, clergy and lay people alike offered moving personal stories and thoughts on what is happening within the UMC in regards to the  full inclusion of  LBGT people.  Communion was celebrated and prayers were offered for our church and the desire to truly become all that God wants us to be.

Methodists for Social Action invited Reconciling Ministry members and supporters to join them for a luncheon at which those who had attended General Conference reported on the highs and lows of that experience.

Information was made available to people attending this year’s conference through a RMN display/bulletin board. Reconciling pins and ribbons were shared and could be seen being worn by delegates throughout the Conference.

Working Together to End Bullying

 

 

Nashville Area Reconciling United Methodists at a January 2011 training session

 

The 2012 Tennessee Annual Conference has been hopeful! There were almost 100 people at the dinner hosted by Nashville Area Reconciling Ministries (NARM) and Tennessee Annual Conference Clergy for Inclusion on Sunday night to hear Bishop Mel Talbert, and there were stoles everywhere you looked in the main plenary, including on stage. Deen Thompson shared beautiful words from the floor of Annual Conference as the first openly gay elected alternative delegate to General/Jurisdictional Conference from the Tennessee Annual Conference about the work that we must do together to ensure our church is an open and welcoming place, and acknowledged the hard moments of General Conference while looking forward to the future.

The Tennessee Annual Conference also adopted a resolution on working to end bullying, which can be read below:

---

Whereas, Many people are hurting from the effects of bullying in the forms of physical and verbal harassment, oppression, and exclusion; and

Whereas at least three youth within the bounds of the Tennessee Annual Conference committed suicide after being bullied in their schools within the last year; and

Whereas, Paragraph 162 of the Book of Discipline states:

“We affirm all persons as equally valuable in the sight of God. We therefore work toward societies in which each person’s value is recognized, maintained, and strengthened. We support the basic rights of all persons to equal access to housing, education, communication, employment, medical care, legal redress for grievances, and physical protection. We deplore acts of hate or violence against groups or persons based on race, ethnicity, gender, sexual orientation, religious affiliation, or economic status. Our respect for the inherent dignity of all persons leads us to call for the recognition, protection, and implementation of the principles of The Universal Declaration of Human Rights so that communities and individuals may claim and enjoy their universal, indivisible, and inalienable rights;” and

Whereas, the effects of bullying can halt the healthy development of all people socially, emotionally, and spiritually. According to a study by Iowa State University, “Individuals who are bullied experience severe emotional consequences such as anxiety, passivity, academic problems, social deficits, and low self-esteem.”^[1] Bullying leads young people to isolation and prevents them from creating healthy friendships with their peers. This isolation can lead to participation in high risk behaviors; and

Whereas, Jesus taught, “you shall love your neighbor as yourself.” (Matthew 22:39).

Be it therefore resolved,

That the following resolution is adopted by the Tennessee Annual Conference

We vow that, as churches and people of faith, we will no longer be silent about the value of each and every life.

To that end, we categorically oppose the practices of bullying in all its forms.

We urge our churches, Committees, Campus Ministries and Camping Retreat Ministries to create safe space for each and every child of God, without regard to religion, race, ethnicity, culture, citizenship, socio-economic status, gender identity, physical or mental ability, and sexual orientation.

Further, in the spirit of advocating for safe sanctuary, we call upon every United Methodist to respond to acts of bullying with acts of compassion. We will take a public stand against speeches of hate, harassment and acts of violence filled with long-held prejudices against all persons.

Moreover, we call upon the Church and society to intentionally validate, support, and empower persons being injured by bullying behavior in workplaces, in schools, and in all environments.

 

Signed:

Nashville Area Reconciling Ministries (NARM)

Tennessee Annual Conference Clergy for Inclusion

---

^[1] "Science of Parenting » Bullying Statistics and Long-term Effects." ISU Extension Blogs. 9 Nov. 2010. Web. 23 Mar. 2011. <http://blogs.extension.iastate.edu/scienceofparenting/2010/11/09/bullying-statistics-and-long-term-effects/>.

 

New England Delegation: UMC's Identity & Unity Must Be Spiritual, Not Structural

- From the United Methodist Reporter -

And no one pours new wine into old wineskins. Otherwise, the wine will burst the skins, and both the wine and the wineskins will be ruined. No, they pour new wine into new wineskins.

(Mark 2:22 The NIV)

Preface

In 2012 the United Methodist Church came of age.  We may not know it yet, but when the motion to adjourn General Conference came at 10:45 on Friday evening, May 4, from Joey Lopez of North Carolina, we were launched from the cozy confines of the nest that had sheltered us for the last 44 years into a new world that we can hardly begin to imagine.

 Some of us may have sensed it at the time, but for most of us there has been a growing realization that what we have been counting on to save our church will never be sufficient for the task.  If we were depending on getting our legislative house in order, we failed to do so.  If we were hoping that instituting strong centralized leadership would be the panacea, all the plans went up in smoke.  If we thought a common theological perspective, or a unified worldview, or new language around inclusion would rescue us—none of these were anywhere to be seen.

 The reality is that the United Methodist church is too big and too diverse to be held together by any of the centers we have relied upon for more than four decades.  We will not be saved by our bishops, our polity, our structure, our metrics, our theology, our doctrine, our social principles, or by Roberts Rules of Order. Thank God!  What Tampa taught us is that the vitality of United Methodism is not to be found in any of its structures.  Our strength and our unity lie in our identity as a spiritual movement, grounded in the grace of God and linked by common practices of personal and social holiness.  Nothing more, nothing less.

 We in the New England delegation are convinced that all efforts to impose a common identity on the Church theologically, ecclesiologically or culturally are not only doomed to failure, but actually thwart the attempts of United Methodist Christians to follow faithfully in the ways of Jesus Christ.  We believe that the old Church with its old myths of a common identity imposed from the center has failed.  We further hold that any new structures that emerge in the years ahead must emphasize relationship among the wonderfully diverse parts of our communion rather than uniformity of practice across the connection.  Further, such plans must not only permit, but must encourage communities to freely meet the needs of people in their own contexts, resourced but not controlled by the support structures of the church.  Such structures include The Discipline, the episcopacy, the General Conference and the boards and agencies.  Each exists only to equip and serve the servants of God’s people.

 Observations

• We are not defeated or dismayed by what happened and what did not happen at the General Conference.  We in the New England delegation, while recognizing that much of what we had hoped for may not have come to fruition, understand that the aftermath of General Conference presents us with new opportunities to reshape the church in a more just and equitable fashion. This opportunity is offered not just to those who attended General Conference but to all in the UMC who are called to serve God’s people. 

• The expanding role of the Central Conferences, both numerically and politically, has created a new reality in the church.  The church can no longer operate from a US-centric perspective at General Conference, nor will the theological and cultural norms with which those of us in the US have become familiar suffice for us going forward.  Our future will not be a recapitulation of our past.  There are difficult challenges ahead as the UMC attempts to address worldwide structure issues.  Ours is a church divided by language, culture, theology, social perspective and economic means, just to name a few.  We are hampered by the reality that enabling legislation to create the framework for a new worldwide structure failed four years ago because many in the church were afraid of what it might portend.  (Proposed Constitutional amendments that would have eliminated the term “Central Conferences” in favor of “Regional Conferences” and would have included the US as one of those regions were passed by General Conference, but not endorsed by the required number of persons voting in the annual conferences.) Still, we can find hope and unity if we can envision ways for our Wesleyan heritage to keep us in relationship and our structure to allow us to minister freely and fully in our unique contexts.  If we can rise to this challenge, we may well be on the verge of the richest blessings our church has yet known.

• Any plan for reorganization of the church needs to begin almost immediately and have broad buy-in from many voices, so that it arrives at GC 2016 with momentum and consensus already established.  We must move away from the notion of proportional representation (i.e. areas with the largest membership get the greatest say) and ask instead which perspectives need to be represented in creating our new church.  It may well be that constituencies that are entirely under-represented at the moment are key to the future of the denomination.  Whatever we do, it must be crystal clear that the purpose of any plan is to enable ministry and not to consolidate power.

• Annual Conferences must monitor closely the new power that has been put in the hands of the bishops to withhold appointment from elders in good standing in order to make certain that this tool is not being used to inhibit prophetic and/or inclusive ministry.  Clergy sessions of the annual conference must be especially vigilant in this area.  Additionally we need proactive guidelines for missional appointment-making that protect prophetic preaching and preserve racial, ethnic and gender diversity in our pulpits.  The legislation passed by the General Conference was intended to ensure more effective pastoral leadership in our churches.  We remind ourselves and our appointive authorities that effectiveness can only be truly assessed by taking into consideration the contexts into which persons are sent.

• The New England Delegation is clear that the unity of the church cannot come at the expense of being a fully inclusive church.  Council of Bishops President Rosemary Wenner’s apology to GLBT United Methodists for the harm that our church has caused was a much welcomed and long overdue word, but we need more than words.  The majority of our delegation remains committed to the creation of a UMC where all God’s people are welcome to share all of their gifts.

• We believe that the most fruitful change in any organization always comes from the edges and never from the center.  We are encouraged that the conversation has continued in so many places after General Conference.  We are concerned that these conversations are still confined to the US and challenge those who are engaged in them to expand the circle to the Central Conferences.  Still, we are pleased that so many people still care so passionately about the church we all love.

Northern Illinois United Methodists Commit to Back LGBTs

- From a news release - 

Proclaiming the Baptismal promise to "resist evil, injustice, and oppression in whatever forms they present themselves," United Methodists in the Northern Illinois Conference (NIC) today made the commitment to "embrace the higher law of 'Biblical obedience'" by signing a pledge of resistance and non-cooperation against the global denomination's discrimination against lesbian, gay, bisexual, and transgender (LGBT) persons and their allies.

In a point of personal privilege on the Annual Conference floor, Rev. Donald Guest (currently serving as Consultant to the Bishop on Urban Ministry at California-Nevada Conference) yesterday said "I hope this Conference will stand against the tide of the vote for discrimination. I hope this Conference will consider that the lesbian, gay, transgender, and bisexual people we are talking about are human beings — and they are people who belong to Jesus Christ."

Rejoicing in the ministry already happening in the NIC, those who are resisting took to celebration tonight with "Alleluia Anyhow!" — a Cabaret featuring many from in Reconciling Ministry Network (RMN) congregations in the Conference.

RMN is the organization of congregations who are open and affirming with persons who identify as LGBT, and were a partner with the Methodist Federation for Social Action (MFSA) in the "Love Your Neighbor" Common Witness Coalition at the General Conference held every four years, where the global denomination voted in May to continue its discriminatory language against LGBT persons.

Current Chairperson of the RMN Board and Lead Pastor of First United Methodist Church in Arlington Heights Rev. Bonnie Beckonchrist says, "in the NIC, we are fortunate to be a Reconciling Conference, but our witness is so critical to those in places where the church's official stance continues to do harm." Beckonchrist says the national number of RMN congregations and communities is 511, 12 of whom have joined since General Conference, and 30 of which are in the NIC.

Rev. Phil Blackwell, Lead Pastor of First UMC (Chicago Temple) and MC for tonight's Cabaret invited clergy and lay colleagues to join the movement of non-cooperation "in order to carry out the ministry to which we are called." On the first day of circulating petitions, over 200 people signed the declaration that reads: "While we are deeply saddened that such a step has become necessary, we live in hope that the day will not be long in coming when our beloved church will remember its roots and once more be guided by love."

The declaration's supporters cite the denomination's own "law book," the Book of Discipline, for its actions: "paragraph 164f recognizes 'the right of individuals to dissent when acting under the constraint of conscience and after having exhausted all legal recourse, to resist or disobey laws that they deem to be unjust or that are discriminately enforced.' We hold as United Methodists that the church cannot impose rules for society that it is unwilling to impose for itself and its members."

According to Rev. Marti Scott, pastor at Euclid Avenue UMC in Oak Park, "we must refuse to obey unjust laws." In Northern Illinois, says Scott, "our congregations are filled with LGBT persons who are in our Bible studies, leadership committees, and every aspect of ministry in the church. Our declaration today affirms the ministry we are already dedicated to and practicing," she says.

Euclid Ave. UMC, where Scott is pastor, bears the outdoor sign "Jesus was radically inclusive" as a witness in its outreach and ministry; those who today claimed the resistance movement choose that radical inclusion to let people know that NIC local churches are available for them as places to experience the love of God and the power of a faithful congregation in ministry with their communities.

"I am concerned about the teenager somewhere out there who hears the 'church' say that God doesn't love LGBT persons," says Rev. Gregory Gross, who serves the UMC in ministry at the Center on Halsted in Chicago, "and I want them to hear loud and clear that the denominational action does not speak for us. Our witness as United Methodist Christians who believe God created us all as beloved can save lives."

For those seeking such inclusive communities, there are 30 RMN-affiliated congregations in Northern Illinois. The list can be found at www.rmnetwork.org/ .

A Time For Marriage

by Rev. Bonnie Beckonchrist

“Hey, Pastor Bonnie, this is Beth and Ursula, remember us?” the callers queried.

Well, of course I remembered them. They had been part of my former congregation in the city.

“Seventeen years ago, you made our relationship holy. Now, we hope you’ll make it legal.”

“I’d be honored,” I replied quickly. How could I do otherwise?

I had been to the Chicago Cultural Center for the Governor of Illinois’ signing of the civil union legislation the day before, one of 1200 invitees. While I was seated in the great hall awaiting Governor Quinn, I got an email announcing the release of the Retired Bishops Counsel to the Church. Tears welled in my eyes as surely I was surrounded by the evidence that God was indeed doing a new thing.

Before the prohibition against performing any celebration of a homosexual union was added to the Book of Discipline (1996) and the Judicial Council ruling number 833, which declared that the social principles were in fact law and not simply recommendations, I had celebrated at least a dozen holy unions.

Nearly two decades ago, it was with a bit of poetic defiance and delight that I would raise my hands at the conclusion of the holy union liturgy and proclaim, “And now by no power invested in me by either the church or the state, I pronounce that you are Life Partners. Those whom God has joined together, let no one put asunder.”

Well, now the state of Illinois grants me power to unite them while The United Methodist Church continues to do what it can to put such love asunder every day. It insists on declaring the fullness of these women’s lives as “incompatible” with Christian teaching. It requires its clergy to dispense their blessing unequally; to deny their pastoral blessing to some of their parishioners.

Together with over 1000 of my United Methodist colleagues, I simply cannot and will not abide by this prescription for discrimination.

Beth and Ursula’s family now includes a son and daughter, a bright and articulate teen and preteen who are loved and cherished and love their mothers in return.

Many of the guests who will attend the upcoming civil union were in attendance at Ursula and Beth’s holy union — parents, siblings, co-workers, and long time friends. Others, community members and parents they’ve met at the kids’ school, will be there, too.

And this time, a generation then yet unborn, will stand by their mothers’ sides. I will stand where I stood then, before those gathered to witness love declared and before our loving God who is bigger than The United Methodist Church.

There Is Hope

Deborah Weekley

When I was asked to talk about what gives me hope today in The United Methodist Church, I chose to write about a video my husband David and I made last summer. This video gives me hope because the Reconciling Ministries Network has included us in this project. Coming out was a difficult decision and we knew the journey would not necessarily be easy. I believe with my whole being that it is the Living God, through the Living Christ, who has called us to take this step. Since we first told our story publicly in August of 2009, we have received emails, letters, and calls from around the globe from disenfranchised United Methodists, both those who have left the denomination because of its discrimination against lesbian, gay, bisexual, and transgender people, and those who would not even consider entering a church or embracing Christianity because of the bullying they have experienced from Christians and the church. We have been thanked by ALL of these folks for telling our story and told that it gives them hope. Perhaps they can find a church in which to feel more at ease within a denomination that celebrates the diversity of crea tion as United Methodists follow Christ's teaching to “love our neighbor as ourselves."

Change is Coming

These past two weeks have been very exciting. We had the joy of seeing marriage equality pass in Washington state and of seeing the governor sign the bill into law. Then it passed in New Jersey, a place that just last year struggled, unsuccessfully, to pass it. Then, finally (and this is closest to my heart, as a someone serving in a Maryland church), marriage equality passed in Maryland's House of Delegates, the chamber that was uncertain about it until the vote occurred. It was in this chamber that, just one year ago, the votes were not there, and they were forced to table the measure. Now the bill will go to the state Senate, where it is expected to pass, and then on to the governor, who has promised to sign it. There is still work to do to see that this happens as nothing is assured until the bill is signed. On top of that, both Maryland and Washington will likely have this bill on the November ballot. Regardless of the work ahead, we must celebrate the hard work of so many for the cause of equality, those working to see this world we live in become the vision of the world that Jesus gave to us -- a world free of inequity and oppression. Of course, marriage equality is not the end of our justice causes, and long after this struggle is over there will continue to be others. . . but today, we can celebrate. 

Of course, what we really need to celebrate, even more than the events of the past two weeks, is what they seem to be pointing to -- that change IS coming, that the world is coming around to seeing the inherent worth of all God's LGBTQ children. In 2005, when I was graduating college, I wondered if I would ever see marriage equality in my lifetime, and now it is happening. I think there are many people in The United Methodist Church feeling this same way, wondering if it will happen in their lifetime. For those who are wondering this, take these past two weeks as a sign of the coming change. In the last ten years we have seen most of the major Protestant denominations change. It can happen for us in the UMC as well; we just have to get to work. In less than three months, the UMC will descend upon Tampa, Florida for General Conference. This is our opportunity for change. We have less than three months to talk to our delegations and share our stories, experiences, love of God, and our desire to see our church be what Christ has called it to be. We can change the world. Change is happening all around us. Let's get to work and see that this change also comes to The United Methodist Church this year.

Bishop Celebrates Washington Marriage Equality

Recently, Bishop Grant Hagiya of the Pacific Northwest and Alaska Annual Conferences publicly expressed his disagreement with UM policy regarding same-sex marriage. We at Reconciling Ministries Network, together with our friends at Methodist Federation for Social Action and Affirmation: United Methodists, would like to thank Bishop Hagiya for speaking out in favor of our cause.

Read Bishop Hagiya's letter below. 

I give you a new commandment, that you love one another.  Just as I have loved you, you also should love one another.  By this everyone will know that you are my disciples, if you have love for one another.  John 13:34-35 I greet you in the very name of our Lord, Jesus Christ!   Difficult letters, like difficult conversations are never easy. However, God never promised us easy, and there are times when we must take up the cross and walk in faith. I write today not representing the United Methodist Church, for only General Conference can do that. So, even though I write this letter as your Bishop, I hope it will also be received as your friend in Christ.   With the signing by Governor Gregoire of a bill legalizing same-sex marriage in Washington as of June 7th, the state joins six others in recognizing this union. Personally, I celebrate the signing into law of the legalization of same-sex marriage for our state. It is an historic moment for the people of this geographic region, and it marks a secular turning point in the liberation of those who have too long been oppressed in our current times. I celebrate with those who will be free to enjoy equal health and security benefits through the state institution of marriage.      I also personally grieve over our United Methodist Church polity that will not recognize same-sex marriage. I believe that it is wrong, and we should work for a more inclusive and humane response. The reason for this stance is that I believe that Jesus Christ is the incarnation of God's divine love for the entire creation, and no one should be shut out from God's embracing Grace. God's Grace is so pure and encompassing that anything that attempts to limit or control this love must be transformed.   In all humility, I realize that this represents my faith, and even though I must live by what I believe, I am fully aware that equally devout United Methodists have different views. To force my faith onto someone who has a different or opposing view is also to limit God's divine love. I believe the loving example we must set is to come together for dialogue in mutual respect. Respectful dialogue means that we listen to one another honestly and openly. Dialogue does not mean that each side tries to win the other over with an opposing point of view, but pauses to hear the honest thoughts and feelings of the other side.   I deeply respect those who have different views on this issue, and even though I share my faith perspective here, I do not presume that this must be their truth as well. I believe that all human nature is flawed, and that God holds the only "Truth" with a capital "T". We humans can only approximate the truth, and no person has a monopoly on it.   Our Pacific Northwest Annual Conference has been deeply divided by this very issue in the past. People have been hurt, self-righteousness has abounded, and lives have been damaged. This is not an embodiment of God's divine Grace, and I pray that we can respond differently in the future. If we are to truly live by God's love, then we need to treat each other with the respect of any creature made by God's hand. All of us have the dignity and self-worth of a child of God.   I am not asking for a tepid and false peacefulness. We will disagree and not see eye-to-eye. I am not looking for an all-encompassing harmony in our present reality, but these great issues that divide us will not go away, and I call on all of us to enter into a civil dialogue that speaks of mutual respect. When such social issues threaten to pull us apart as the Body of Christ, I invite every United Methodist into the art of Holy Conferencing. Our times call upon us to model the love of Jesus Christ through our love for one another.   Even though we will disagree, I believe in my very bones that God is at work in the world, and in our lives. We have been shown a glimpse of God's spiritual vision: where the wolf and lamb lie together, where water springs from the desert, and where weapons of war will be turned into instruments of life-giving peace.   I hold that vision before you on this day, and I also hold all of you in my prayers. As we continue as the "people of the way" let Christ be our guide and salvation, and let love rule our hearts and minds.   Be the Hope,  Bishop Grant Hagiya

THE UNITED METHODIST CHURCH - SEATTLE AREA  Pacific Northwest Conference / Alaska Conference PO Box 13650 (Street Address: 816 S. 216th St. #2)  Des Moines, Washington 98198-1009  206-870-6810 1-800-755-7710 Fax 206-870-6811 Gretchen Engle, Administrative Assistant

Marriage Equality in Washington

On Monday, February 13th, same-sex couples in the state of Washington won the right to marry. Governor Chris Gregoire signed gay marriage into law, making Washington the seventh state to legalize same-sex marriage. A tearful Gregoire announced: "We’re here to make history here in the great state of Washington..This is a very proud day...A day that we did what was right, what was just, what was fair." The rest of the article is here: http://www.edgeonthenet.com/?129916

What Would You Do?

By Rev. Troy G. Plummer 

It has been ten years since the bomb threat at our Freedom to Marry ceremony. Ten years ago on February 12, Walter and I joined about 50 other couples to share rings and vows. As parents gathered the smaller kids together and scurried out of the church, I was so proud of the United Methodist pastor who calmly advanced us to the next part of the service inviting love to overcome fear.

Just 8 ½ years ago, I searched around the church office to find the nearest other LGBT person. She and I then joined hands and jumped up and down singing “we are not criminals anymore.” Just hours before as we woke up that morning with our partners in our own homes in Houston, Texas, we had been criminals. That morning criminals, but by midday we were not as the Supremes issued Lawrence v. Texas.

This month, we saw Prop 8 taking one more step to the new set of Supremes and wonder if we will have more to sing about for California’s lesbian and gay families. Soon Washington state will advance marriage equality in a matter of days—the Senate, the House, and now the Governor. Now, a similar marriage equality bill begins in the Illinois legislature a few days later. 

I’m particularly touched by legislators who testify to their own faith journey to a changed heart that moves them to speak publicly and vote differently now. And I’m heartened by new allies and new polls showing a majority of Americans now affirming marriage for all. And I’m lifted by the shifted policies of the UCC, Episcopal, Lutheran, and Presbyterian churches embracing 10 million protestants with inclusion.

Still, I remember the bomb threat. Still, I remember the anti-gay policies of my own United Methodist Church.  Still, I remember clergy put on trial. Still, I remember the silence of allies. And yet, yes another yet, I consider the 38 UM bishops who push for gay ordination and the over 1,100 UM clergy who commit to marriage equality regardless of anti-gay policy.

I really want to hold hands together, and jump up and down, and sing in celebration again—in the church, in The United Methodist Church. Until that day, which will come, because God wants it to, I affirm God’s love overcoming fear in each instance of hearts changed and love lived out. 

Recently, Walter and I went to the First Baptist Church of Galesburg while visiting his dad. During the sharing of thanksgivings, Walter shared, “I’m thankful that as my partner Troy and I near 15 years together, we are planning to get legally married in Iowa and that the marriage will be recognized in Illinois.” They applauded. No bomb threats. And now we have choices to make, which I’m sure will include some songs of celebration.

In the midst of changing times, there won’t always be applause. But marriage is the right word and language does matter. And as the polls, policies, and laws shift, the friendly climate for exclusion and discrimination dissolves. For a recent episode of "What Would You Do?" , a gay couple gets engaged at a restaurant with a vocal detractor nearby to see how the rest of the diners respond.  View and wonder, just what would you do?

Bending Towards Justice

Last week saw two major victories in the civil rights struggle for LGBT people. On Tuesday, a federal appeals court ruled that California’s Proposition 8, which banned gay marriage, is unconstitutional. The ban violates the 14th Amendment’s promise of “equal protection of the laws.” On Wednesday, the Washington State House passed a marriage equality bill, joining the Senate, which voted to do so the previous week. The bill now awaits the governor’s signature. The governor plans to sign it tomorrow, Valentine’s Day, making Washington the seventh state to legalize gay marriage. Meanwhile, a vote in the New Jersey legislature on marriage equality is scheduled for this week. The momentum in civil society towards marriage equality, after decades of struggle, calls to mind Martin Luther King’s oft repeated reminder that “the moral arc of the universe is long, but it bends towards justice.” It is also a reminder that the work of the We do! Methodists Living Marriage Equality initiative – almost 1,000 United Methodists pledged to marry all on an equal basis – presents the best hope for the church to be part of the movement towards justice, rather than an obstacle to it.

Want More People in Your Church?

Welcome more people into it*

It turns out that inclusiveness is attractive and helps churches grow. Prejudice and discrimination, not so much. That’s the lesson learned by one congregation in Ohio, reported in the news last week, which began welcoming LGBT people in 1998 and more than doubled its weekly attendance. Reconciling churches in our own conference, which make their welcome to LGBT people explicit, have also gained members as a direct result. And the excitement and renewed energy that the We do! Methodists Living Marriage Equality initiative has generated are further revitalizing the church, attracting new attention and new members from LGBT communities.

It’s a lesson the UMC seems hellbent on not learning. The church lurches from one desperate program to another to stem the decades-long loss of members, but nowhere in its marketing strategies does it occur to anyone to examine the effect of official prejudice and codified discrimination on its attractiveness to newcomers. Rethink Church offers “Five tips for welcoming visitors,” but having a welcoming theology is not among them. And while they provide “free marketing kits,” apparently no one told them that marketing a defective product doesn’t work. Study after study has documented that the unchurched, particularly young people, are turned off by the hypocrisy and homophobia of anti-gay rules, but these findings are excluded from the marketing advice. The most recent effort, Vital Congregations, delves into the world of so-called “accountability,” requiring congregations to report on supposed measures of inviting and successful churches, but once again refuses to look at how uninviting institutionalized bigotry is.

Perhaps one day UMC officialdom will look the energy, vitality and relevance of the Reconciling movement and conclude that exclusion of God’s LGBT people is not only bad theology, but also bad marketing. Until then, the church seems destined to become “an irrelevant social club,” in the words of Martin Luther King. And in the meantime, MINDful Methodists will simply BE the inclusive church, no matter what the institution says.

__________________________________________________________________________

*This article was originally posted on the Web site of Methodists in New Directions (MIND).

The Signs of Love Conquering Fear Are Everywhere!

A Letter from the RMN Board of Directors

The signs of love conquering fear are everywhere! Supporters of Reconciling Ministries are doing more than ever before. The RMN Called to Witness campaigns in 2011 celebrated 67 regional events where 1595 reconciling persons engaged strategy, reconciling process, public narrative storytelling, and building teams. Of the 682 participants at Sing a New Song, over 100 were young adults.  We placed 500 calls to United Methodist delegates to General Conference. We gave $891,812 to support the mission locally, regionally, nationally, and internationally through Reconciling Ministries Network.

Your generosity made it possible for RMN to gather in coalition with the Methodist Federation for Social Action and Affirmation in early 2011 to plan Love Your Neighbor for both a regional and churchwide impact. Now we are living into the reality of a multinational church and underwrote our first staff persons to engage central conference relationships. You even helped us contract with media experts to conduct focus groups in Cote d'Ivoire and test messages in Uganda, Liberia, South Africa, and other countries to find common cause and build bridges.

Can We Sing a Song from The Same Page

By Peter L. DeGroote

(The following has been written with input from several long-term companions on the reconciling journey. I am thankful for their help but they are not responsible for errors of fact or judgment.)

Marriage equality was legally established in New York because Governor Cuomo required that the various, and sometimes competing, LGBT groups get on the same page. His support required their unity, which he saw necessary for success.

This lesson of “the same page” runs through my mind as I think about the various LGBT related resolutions heading to General Conference, which is often as convoluted and nefarious as any state legislature. Chief among them are those that would provide the following:

• Elimination from the Discipline of the declaration that “the practice of homosexuality is incompatible with Christian teachings.” (¶161.F)
• Elimination of the Disciplinary prohibition of the ordination of LGBT candidates.  (¶304.3)
• Allow the celebration by our clergy and in our churches, at the discretion of the pastor, in those civil jurisdictions that have approved civil unions or marriage equality laws.  (¶341.6)
• Complete removal of all restrictions and prohibitions on the celebration of marriage or civil unions by our clergy and in our churches. (¶341.6)
• Acceptance of the fact that the church suffers from institutional discrimination toward LGBT people and that all negative provisions concerning them should be removed from the Discipline.

Some argue the first priority should be elimination of the declaration that the practice of “homosexuality” is incompatible with Christian teaching. First adopted into the Social Principles in 1972, it served as the foundation for the exclusion from ordination, the ban on celebrating marriage/unions, and even the Judicial Council’s finding that local pastor can deny membership to LGBT people. Those supporting this priority claim that removal of the cornerstone would result in all else eventually falling.

Supporters of resolutions allowing for ordination of LGBT folks point to the many instances of highly qualified people being denied ordination, giving up their calling, or leaving the UMC for another denomination. Further momentum arises from those conferences that do not do not consider sexual identity a relevant factor in determining the qualifications of their candidates, the result being the routine ordination of otherwise qualified LGBT candidates. Further, the recent declaration of support for LGBT ordination by 33 retired bishops brings this into focus for many, their rationale being a clear statement of the many issues. (Note: the retired bishops proposal would eliminate only one of the two versions of the incompatibility language. The foundation declaration at ¶161.F would remain.)

The marriage equality resolutions differ in scope. The first allows for the celebration of marriages in those civil jurisdictions having adopted civil unions or a marriage equality law. It arises out of the many challenges faced by local churches and pastors in those jurisdictions: How do we respond to the pastoral needs of our LGBT members and community expectations?

Those who support the broader marriage equality resolutions take note of the quiet celebration of marriages and civil unions in our churches for quite some time, even where there is no civil legislation to provide a legal context.  For many a church marriage remains a marriage in the minds and spirit of the couple, the pastor, and the congregation. To them, restricting the celebration of LGBT marriage to those civil jurisdictions that have passed the necessary legislation not only seems prejudicial but an abandonment of the Church’s prophetic role, turning the church into an agency serving the state.

Back to the all on “the same page” lesson:  The above alternatives, and others, are related but energized by different experiences and values. Could they all pass? Could a single omnibus resolution including them all pass?  Can we figure out a strategy that allows us to find agreement on priorities and prevent our working against each other?

General Conference procedures further complicate the matter. As in most civil legislatures, resolutions first go to a legislative committee that can endorse, recommend against, combine, or let them die. Further, all LGBT resolutions will not go to the same committee. While the committee assignment of resolutions is not yet entirely clear, our ability to relate to the work of several different legislative committees is a critical factor. It is possible that some of us will go our own way without regard to an overall strategy, thereby diluting our ability to influence the outcomes.

One of the major advantages we have is that many of the people necessary to help us figure out a strategy will be at Sing a New Song in Port Huron, Ohio at the end of August. I do hope we are able to find a way that we can all sing from the same page.

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Peter is a second career pastor who has served in several churches in the Baltimore-Washington Conference. Prior to his ordination, he was a secondary-school teacher, a university lecturer in Government, an Associate in a government related professional association, CEO of a national financial institution. Peter was involved in Mid-Atlantic Affirmation, served on the National Council of Affirmation, and sat on the Board of the Reconciling Congregations Program, the predecessor name for RMN and has worked with BWARM (Baltimore-Washington Reconciling United Methodists).

Don't Ask Don't Tell and the Church

by Rev. Gilbert Caldwell

On Friday, July 22, 2011, Defense Secretary Leon Panetta, Joint Chief of Staff, Admiral Mike Mullen and President Barack Obama sent a notice to the Congress declaring that "...military readiness would not be hurt by a repeal of the 17 year old Don't Ask, Don't Tell policy." This new policy will be in force in 60 days.

The debate about whether the Church should change culture or follow culture has been long-standing. Sadly, the Church has sacrificed much of its justice credibility over the years by "screening out" those whom culture has in time, "screened in". Thus, the Church has been in the forefront of proclaiming exclusion when, after much struggle, society has become inclusive. The history of colonialism, racism and sexism is a history of much of the church playing "catch up" with a changing history.

It is difficult for many of us to comprehend why The United Methodist Church since 1972 has held to its "Don't Ask, Don't Tell" policy vis-a-vis same gender loving clergy. The military, the President and the Congress have decided that maintaining the DADT policy would compromise the values and commitments of the military as well as the values it expects of those who serve in the military.

The United Methodist Church in its Book of Discipline language and legislation expresses the belief that affirming clergy who acknowledge that they are in committed same gender relationships are "incompatible with Christian teaching".There was a time when "Christian teaching" justified colonialism, racism and sexism. The words of the Scriptures that were used to justify these isms have not changed, but the teaching and practice of Christian faith on these isms has changed!

The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints (The Mormons) disavowed polygamy in the 1890's when Utah's statehood was at risk.The Church in 1978 eliminated its policy of refusing to ordain "black men of African descent" into it's priesthood. This was done because of a new "Divine Revelation" that proclaimed the policy of racial exclusion in error. What will it take for The United Methodist Church at the 2012 General Conference to proclaim a "Christian teaching" that includes rather than excludes? The growing inclusiveness of society, a Divine Revelation, or both?

The God who is at work in and beyond the Church is still at work. May The UMC follow God's lead.

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The Rev. Gilbert H. Caldwell is a retired United Methodist Minister who lives in Asbury Park, N.J. He was active in the Massachusetts unit of the Southern Christian Leadership Conference (SCLC) and participated in the civil-rights movement throughout the nation. In 2000, he, with others, organized the RMN Extension ministry United Methodists of Color for a Fully Inclusive Church (UMOC), an organization committed to the full inclusion of LGBT people in every aspect of church and society. Gil is now working on the documentary Truth in Progress (www.truthinprogress.com).His recent book, Something Within: Works by Rev. Gilbert H. Caldwell is available from Church Within A Church.

Response to "The 'Other' Marriage Crisis"

by Rev. Gilbert Caldwell

"Judicial Council isn't the place to decide such matters (same sex marriage). General Conference is...." (A critical comment about my last blog)

We speak of "Holy Conferencing" in the United Methodist Church. This is my effort at engaging in "Holy Conversation" in response to a comment that was critical.

One of the aspects of the "exceptionalism" of the United States of America is our acceptance of the checks and balances that are represented by the Legislative, Judicial and Executive branches of our national government. We have no checks and balances in United Methodism. We believe that the decisions voted by a majority of the delegates at a General Conference have an almost sacred "rightness" about them and therefore should not be challenged or changed until a General Conference, 4 years later does so.

The United States Supreme Court on May 17, 1954 ruled that the practice of racially segregated public schools (separate but equal) was at variance with the equality provisions of our national Constitution. At the time the Methodist Church had a segregated Central Jurisdiction but it was not eliminated until a majority vote of the 1968 General Conference did so. Most Methodists knew that the Central Jurisdiction was in violation of Biblical declarations of inclusion and our own Methodist statments that expressed the same view, but it took 14 years after the 1954 decision for the voters at a General Conference to declare that a "separate but equal" Central Jurisdiction, was a violation of not only Scripture, but Methodist thought and wisdom!

The Methodist Church could have ordained women before 1956 if a Judicial Council had been able to say prohibitions against women were in violation of our understandings of Scripture, our affirmation of the rights of women as Methodists, and at variance with the movement for equal rights for women in the nation at the time. It is time that we find ways other than a majority vote of General Conference to protect the rights of minorities.

I have been disagreed with and questioned over and over again about my ally/advocacy for the equality rights of LGBTQ persons and same sex couples. Some of those who have disagreed with me have been less-than-kind in the ways they have expressed their disagreement. But, being a former "foot soldier" in the Civil Rights Movement in the south and in the north, I have developed the capacity to "keep on keeping on", no matter what.

Why at the age of 76, this month I will be 77, have I been so passionate about advocacy for the equality rights of LGBTQ persons in church and society? Langston Hughes in one of his poems (The Negro Speaks Of Rivers) has written, "I have known rivers...." I have known, I have experienced, I have been wounded, I have been made angry by the slowness of the Methodist and now the United Methodist Church to embrace in its biblical interpretation, its theology, and its practice, deep and authentic responses to its history of racism at worst and racial insensitivity at best. The gradualism of the denomination I love, in its efforts to repair the damage church-sanctioned slavery and racial segregation has harmed, not only those who are black, but all within the Church. It has left wounds within me that have not yet healed. We believe that black "visibility" at every level of the denomination means that we have been healed. But, with all of the black visibility there is, we have not gotten off of our beds and walked boldly to confront the racism that is so obvious all around us. Rather, some exert great pressure on some Board and Agencies and persons when they "dare" to address the elephant of race that is still in the USA room. And, a so-called racially inclusive United Methodist Church remains silent. Is silence the price we pay for being racially diverse?

I have prayed and hoped that the UMC would not do to my LGBTQ sisters and brothers what it has done to those of us who are black. But if we continue to allow majority votes at a General Conference to separate and segregate them from full equality in the United Methodist Church, it becomes de-je-vu all over again.

It is painful to observe that, that done to those of us because of our race, being done to others because of their sexual orientation and gender status. Of course there are differences between racism and heterosexism, but "Injustice anywhere is a threat to justice everywhere". I believe if Martin Luther King were alive, he would ask United Methodism; "Did you not learn from your long struggle against racism that justice cannot wait to be enacted by majority votes. Justice take place when Spirit-led women and men are able to say, "History and culture may have condoned discrimination, but that history and culture was wrong. We say to today's Church, 'All God's children got a song'. Let them sing it in order that we all might be healed."

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The Rev. Gilbert H. Caldwell is a retired United Methodist Minister who lives in Asbury Park, N.J. He was active in the Massachusetts unit of the Southern Christian Leadership Conference (SCLC) and participated in the civil-rights movement throughout the nation. In 2000, he, with others, organized the RMN Extension ministry United Methodists of Color for a Fully Inclusive Church (UMOC), an organization committed to the full inclusion of LGBT people in every aspect of church and society. His recent book, Something Within: Works by Rev. Gilbert H. Caldwell is available from Church Within A Church.

Lay Folks Laying the Foundations for Marriage Equality

by Peter L. DeGroote

After the DC Council approved marriage equality as a civil right in Washington the members of Foundry UMC began discussions that culminated in what was called a Summer of Great Discernment to determine the congregation’s views. While clergy in the UM Church decide on religious services, this wasn’t about clergy decision-making. This was a lay process, what, in hindsight, might be called a lay movement.

A resolution was prepared and discussed over the summer. On September 26 the Congregational Council set the resolution before a Church Conference held under the rules of the Book of Discipline and chaired by our District Superintendent. 377 lay members attended. The vote was 367 yes, 8 no, with 2 invalid votes.

The resolution began with the proclamation that as a community of faith we recognize God’s profound blessing of committed life partnerships, including same-gender couples.  Further, that celebrating those relationships is not only an important part of our church’s ministry but is also a witness to the joy of God’s love.

The resolution also makes a claim on the Church Constitution (Disciplinary para 341.6). The Constitution prohibits the structuring of any organizational unit so as to exclude any member or constituent body because of race, color, national origin, status or economic condition. Noting the incorporation of anti-lgbt provisions into the discipline over the recent past, the resolution asserts that the Constitutional prohibitions against exclusion based on status have been violated.

The resolution closes with two commitments. First: to work within the denomination to change the Book of Discipline so that it “may be consistent with the teachings of Jesus.” This commitment includes working for the respect and honor of same-gender marriages in the same way that all marriages are respected and honored.

The second commitment is to equally support and honor marriages licensed in the District of Columbia without regard to the couple’s gender. Accordingly, it offers and approves use of the church sanctuary for all marriages. Finally, while acknowledging clergy discretion over the conduct of services, the congregation pledged to support those clergy who conduct same gender services.

Word travels, of course. We've heard that some conference leaders were "blown away" by the numbers. How many DSs have ever conducted a church business meeting with 377 people voting and even more people in attendance? We've heard that some conference leaders are wondering how to stop or control a lay movement.

The Bishop did send a letter to all Pastors and lay members of the Annual Conference. On one hand he described the underlying conflict in the church; on the other he urged holy conversation.

What will this lay movement do next? My guess is that they will take the Bishop up on holy conversation—in a big way.

*******

To read the Marriage Equality Proposal, click here

To read the Special Edition of the Foundry Forge regarding the Vote and the Summer of Great Discernment, click here

To read the Congregational Council's response to Bishop John Schol's letter to the Conference, click here

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Peter is a second career pastor who has served in several churches in the Baltimore-Washington Conference. Prior to his ordination, he was a secondary-school teacher, a university lecturer in Government, an Associate in a government related professional association, CEO of a national financial institution. Peter was involved in Mid-Atlantic Affirmation, served on the National Council of Affirmation, and sat on the Board of the Reconciling Congregations Program, the predecessor name for RMN and has worked with BWARM (Baltimore-Washington Reconciling United Methodists).

The end of the beginning...

by Joey Heath

What a victory for the equality of all people especially lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender, queer (lgbtq) people. Judge Walker has ruled that it violates the US Constitution to discriminate against lgbtq people by denying them access to marriage. This ruling says there is not “gay marriage” or “straight marriage” only marriage which is open to all people and can not be denied to anyone. It says that in no way are lgbtq couples inferior to heterosexual couples. This is such a momentous step and it could be the beginning of dominoes toppling. I can see it coming. First the overturning of this discriminatory law is upheld and then equality begins to pick up momentum. Before long another discriminatory marriage law is struck down and then another and then another just like dominoes each one leading to another falling until finally all the laws discriminating against lgbtq people are gone. What a time to be alive, to see equality become a reality. But we are not there yet.

I believe it was Winston Churchill who first used the phrase “the end of the beginning”. This is where I believe we are, moving from the beginning of our struggle to the middle. We are not at the end and those who oppose equality are only going to push back harder. We can not get complacent and assume victory will come because if we do then the progress we are making will be lost. Celebrate our victory today and then tomorrow get up and continue the struggle. There is still so much work to do before we will have full equality for all people.

Then of course we can not forget that even as it looks like there will be equality under the law we still do not have equality in the United Methodist Church. Membership. The Book of Discipline still contains the discriminatory and untrue language that states “homosexuality is incompatible with Christian teachings”. In 2012 we will meet again for General Conference this time in Tampa and I am sure we will once again bring the issue of equality to the table. This means we have a little less than two years to help shape the way the General Conference will vote on the issues of equality and inclusion. This is a huge task but one that is not beyond our reach if we spend the next two years telling our stories and speaking out for the cause of inclusion. Talk to the people in your congregation, talk to your neighbors, talk to your co-workers, talk to everyone, and tell them about God's inclusive love and why it is so important for us as the church to be open and welcoming to all people. The world is changing and it is an exciting time to be alive. Let us pray that as the world moves forward so the church will also.

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Joey Heath is a 26 year old life long United Methodist. He is currently a graduate student at Wesley Theological Seminary completing his Masters in Divinity. Once an ordained pastor, Joey hopes he will be able to bring real change to the UMC on the issues of sexuality and gender identity at the broader church level, but also with individuals, so that one day the church will truly be a place that is inclusive of all people.

Unity, false and otherwise

by David Hosey

I was so grateful to read Renee Sappington's post in regards to the Mississippi Annual Conference.

Mississippi's been on my mind recently, ever since a friend shared with me the wording of Resolution #3. The resolution, responding to a presentation given by Renee and her partner at last year's Annual Conference, read in part:

"AND WHEREAS, as a result of this testimony, great harm has been done to the Mississippi Annual Conference of the United Methodist Church. The results of this testimony were division, embarrassment, anger, and frustration. Some churches lost members and some withheld apportionments in protest."

The direction of this argument is one that has become familiar across our conferences and across our churches as we work to co-create a church that is as fully just, inclusive, and loving as our just, inclusive, and loving Savior would desire it to be.

Arguments against inclusion such as this one originate in a belief that it is not exclusion or silencing that cause pain in our churches and our communities, but rather the struggle to end exclusion and silencing. Bringing up taboo topics, the argument goes, means division. Stay silent and we can maintain unity.

Of course, for those who feel excluded or persecuted by the very church that should love them, this "unity" is the unity of closets and half-lives, not a a true unity of integrity and wholeness. It's a unity based on scapegoats--a unity based on exclusion. And it is this false unity that is creating "embarrassment, anger, and frustration" and is causing us to lose some of the most dedicated disciples and ministers of our church.

Case in point: A friend of mine recently send me a copy of a letter that he had also sent to his Bishop, District Superintendent, and District Committee on Ministry. The letter reads, in part:

"It has become clear to me in the past few months that at this point I cannot, in good conscience, continue in the process toward ordination in the United Methodist Church. I cannot, as a person of integrity operate under the current “don’t ask, don’t tell” policy of the United Methodist Church in regard to Sexual Orientation. I love the United Methodist Church. It is through the church that I have been formed and experienced my call to discipleship and my call to ministry. It pains me to realize that I must go elsewhere to truly live out my calling with integrity. I pray, that through the Grace of God, the United Methodist Church will one day come to realize the sinfulness of a policy that force women and men to lie about who they are and hide their spouses, children, and other loved ones....I look forward with great hopefulness to the day when no one has to write a senseless letter like this to the United Methodist Church."

Let's work and pray for that great day.

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David Hosey is a life-long United Methodist and will be entering Wesley Theological Seminary in the Fall of 2010. From July 2007-July 2010, he worked as a Mission Intern with Global Ministries of the United Methodist Church, serving with the Sabeel Center in Jerusalem, Israel/Palestine and the US Campaign to End the Israeli Occupation in Washington, DC, U.S.A. He is an inquiring candidate for ordained ministry in the United Methodist Church and also blogs at http://hoseyblog.blog.com. He attends Dumbarton UMC in Washington, DC, which is where a friend first asked him whether he would become a Reconciling United Methodist. He said yes. Now you're stuck with him.

Annual Conference Update: Texas

 by Laura Young

This year, Breaking the Silence (BTS) hosted its 14th annual luncheon at the Texas Annual Conference (Texas AC). Approximately 300 clergy and laity gathered to hear director Ky Dickens talk to us about her newly released documentary, “Fish Out of Water.” She shared experiences and valuable information accumulated as she toured the nation interviewing theologians, scholars, and hundreds of LGBT persons longing to be welcomed in their churches. Included in her speech was a challenge to Believe Out Loud, and to begin now, in this critical 12 months leading up to the 2011 election year when we will elect delegates to General Conference. If we begin now, and spend the next year believing out loud, we have the potential to truly impact the election results and the representatives we send to General Conference in 2012.

Some clergy and laity began believing out loud as soon as they left the BTS luncheon and returned to the afternoon business session. Bering Memorial UMC in Houston (the only reconciling congregation in the Texas AC) provided “goody bags” for all who attended the BTS luncheon. Inside the goody bags was a variety of fun items to help us believe out loud. They included buttons, pencils, stickers, lanyards (the ribbons we wear around our necks to hold our conference name badges), and candy, of course! Buttons are always a big hit and we saw them on shirts, jackets, and tote bags throughout the rest of the week, but the lanyards win the prize this year! You see, when we registered for annual conference we received a red lanyard custom made to say, “Texas Annual Conference.” Our goody bags provided blue lanyards custom made to say, “Breaking the Silence.” Some of our clergy and laity chose to permanently replace their red TEXAS AC lanyard with the blue BTS lanyard for the rest of the conference. Because they were different from the official lanyard, they stuck out and became a visible witness and great conversation starter!

We must move from being Reconciling United Methodists to Reconciling United Methodists who Believe Out Loud. Each of us is likely in a different place on that particular journey. Your next step toward being a Reconciling United Methodist who believes out loud is probably different from the next step your neighbor needs to take. For some in the Texas AC, wearing that blue BTS lanyard into the business session was a huge first step toward believing out loud. BTS invites everyone to join us. Whatever that next step is for you . . . . take it!

Liberated to take action here and now

by Ann Thompson Cook

As you know from my last post, several clergy who affiliate with Dumbarton UMC are proceeding to conduct legal, same-sex weddings in Washington, DC. The following is excerpted from a deeply reflective letter that Rev. Harry Kiely wrote to his Dumbarton clergy brothers and sisters and agreed to share with you:

In his famous Letter from a Birmingham Jail, Dr. King noted the silence of the white churches in the face of the injustices of racial segregation. He challenged the religious leaders who were warning him against moving “too fast” that such thinking is condescending, and that its advocates “paternalistically feel that [they] can set the timetable for another [person]’s freedom.”

In today’s struggle over full LGBT rights, including marriage equality, justice-seekers are once again admonished to postpone their movement until a more convenient time.

We are being criticized for “stirring up” hostile feelings. We need to remember that the hostility is buried deep in the false illusions of homophobia. Uprooting these injustices and exposing them to the light of Christ’s radiant presence does not create conflict but exposes the lies that are used to suppress gay freedom.

Resurrection faith involves the crucifixion of the false idol of homophobia and proclaiming the good news that the tomb is empty. The message we are called to echo is that our sisters and brothers are simply demanding the right to be treated as human beings.

For us who are the surviving disciples, the news is unbelievably good and our mission is absolutely clear. Just as the resurrected Jesus did not condemn the disciples for their cowardice and betrayal, he does not condemn those of us who have been slow to stand up for gay justice.

Yes, we were wrong. Yes, we were slow to respond. Yes, we put off making a faithful decision. But Christ has set us free from the burden of guilt. Furthermore, we are not only set free from such guilt, we are absolved and liberated to take action here and now in this time and in these circumstances. Our sin of avoidance has been transformed into a new and empowered call for justice.

Finally, it behooves us to be awake to the grace that befalls those we encounter as our adversaries. The temptation to divide the “good” people from the “bad” people is ever present. Our adversaries are the recipients of grace, just as we are. As we hold firm to our gospel convictions, we remember how Peter, when arrested, simply stood by his faith. He proclaimed the gospel of grace to his adversaries, yet without condemning them. This, also, is our call.

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Ann Thompson Cook directs Many Voices, which later this year will launch an online, ecumenical clearinghouse of worship and educational resources for the welcoming movement. Her books on sexual orientation and gender diversity—And God Loves Each One, Dios nos ama por iqual, and Made in God’s Image—are distributed by eight national organizations including RMN.

Pain from Equality

The title may be a little confusing to some. You may be thinking what pain is there in equality, so let me explain. In my city, Washington, DC, the city council will be voting on marriage equality for the District very soon. It is our belief is that this will pass and we are also hopeful that it will be accepted by Congress (as we are the only city subject to have our laws reviewed by Congress). We know there will be celebration when this does happen but then there will also most likely be pain. See here is DC we are up to six reconciling congregations inside the city and I had not thought about this possible pain until just recently.

Here is the problem. We as reconciling United Methodist are known for our accepting and welcoming attitudes towards LGBT people. If DC marriage equality passes sad days may follow for the reconciling congregations here. The problem is how to react when LGBT couples show up asking to get married at our church. They have heard that reconciling means we are accepting of all people, but sadly they will have to be turned away. See the United Methodist Church bans us from having any service celebrating the union of LGBT people in our churches. The United Methodist Church has also banned our pastors from performing these ceremonies with past punishment being the loss of ordination. So when LGBT people show up at out churches, and they will show up, we will have to turn them away because of policies we see as wrong. Now the hard part is these couples will not understand that, they will only hear that they are once again being rejected by the church and that they have no place in the church. Once again we are turning away those turning to the church. Once again the United Methodist Church will cause pain instead of bringing the love of God. How do you think Jesus would feel about that? The Jesus I know does not turn people away but rather embraces them and loves them right where they are.

Pray for the pain that will come from equality and pray that equality will come to the United Methodist Church.

When persons become persons, rather than abstractions ("Them" or "They")

By Rev. Gilbert H. Caldwell

Years ago, a white ministerial colleague of mine, shared this story about his white congregation and their experience with their young organist who was black.*

My colleague said that at first there was resistance in the congregation to their new and young organist because of his race. But in time, their negative attitudes were transformed by his musical gifts and by his personality. Many of the older persons in the congregation "adopted" him as their grandson. He as a person became more important to them, than his race. I missed  seeing my colleague for a few months. The next time I saw him I asked about the organist and the congregation. He said this; "Gil, he developed a serious illness and died suddenly. The grief in the congregation was a kind of grief I had not experienced before. I realized that for many persons in the congregation, getting to know and love the black organist was the first time they had known a black person as a person and not as some-less than person created by years of prejudice". Then he said; "Gil, when he died, this was the first time many persons had ever grieved over the death of a black person whom they had come to know. His life and then his death transformed the bigotry and, "the hate that they had been taught by the time they were 7 or 8". (From South Pacific)

The "protection" of marriage as an institution, has become for some, much like the "protection" of segregation as an institution, that I experienced in North Carolina where I was born and Texas where I spent my teen-age years. Apparently for some, it is easier to maintain the status quo of institutions than it is to affirm the God-given humanity of LGBT persons and same gender loving couples. How many of them must live and die, before church and society affirm them?

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Throughout my ministry some persons have asked why I consistently in my writing and speaking, use illustrations that are race-based. I respond by saying that I do this because in my remembering of my racial experience and history, I am better able to understand and respond to the struggles of others. This I believe is what Supreme Court nominee, Judge Sonia Sotomayor was saying about her experience as a Latina. If I am unable or unwilling to allow my experience as an African American male, to influence my understandings of the bias and bigotry others experience, I compromise the meaning of my experience.

When Love Gets Lost in the Scuffle

By Rev. Gilbert H. Caldwell

I have lived through that peculiar moment in American history, when it came to marriage, many Christians were more concerned about the race of persons who love each other, than the quality and content of their love for each other. Now, many Christians are more concerned about the gender of persons who love each other than they are about their love for each other.

Although biology may be more appropriate in discussions about gender than about race, I ask where is the theology of those persons who say that love is less-than-authentic when shared by persons of the same gender or of different races?

First John 1:1a comes to mind this morning as I write this: "See what love God has given us, that we should be called the children of God." Some Christians who boast of their "Bible Believing" ignore the love of God, as they combat same gender marriage. Thus they give more attention to gender as a biological construct than they do to love as a theological construct.

In 1939 Cole Porter wrote these words in a song that those in California who stand in the way of same gender marriage ought sing: "What is this thing called love? This funny thing called love? Just who can solve its mystery? Why should it make a fool of me? I saw you there one wonderful day. You took my heart and threw it away. That's why I ask the Lord in heaven above, what is this thing called love?"

We would think that persons who claim to be in frequent conversation with God would understand the love that flows from God that we share with each other. But their responses to the love of God that is expressed by persons of the same gender to each other, indicates they don't have a clue.

Gil Caldwell 

Poster from Chicago Prop. 8 Protest

The Pursuit of Happiness

By Joey Heath

In  1776, primarily written by Thomas Jefferson, the second continental congress adopted what became known as the Declaration of Independence.  In this we find one of the most famous quotes in all of American history which states “We hold these truths to be self evident that all men are created equal, that they are endowed with certain unalienable rights, that among these are Life, Liberty, and the pursuit of Happiness.” I think those are very powerful words that most if not all Americans hold as core values of our American society. The part I want to focus in on is the “pursuit of happiness” clause. The U.S. was founded on the basis that everyone had a chance to better themselves and seek after a happy life free from tyranny and oppression. Now I think it is important to point out that when this was written it was really speaking about white, male, heterosexual, landowners. The great thing is that during the course of our history as we as humans have become better understanding of innate human rights we have expanded this phrase to include the less affluent, woman, and persons of color. Sadly there is one group that has yet to reach the level of equality that these others groups have and that is LGBT people. We claim the pursuit of happiness is for everyone and yet we tell our LGB people brothers and sisters that seeking to find happiness with someone of the same gender is wrong and that it is better to be single and lonely then live in what some consider to be “sin”. And if you are transgender we tell you that despite the fact that your internal self does not match up with your external physiology you should remain as you are. For LGB people we are saying it is wrong to seek after integrity and living as who you really are and seeking to find a partner to share your life with. For transgender people we are saying that your happiness in your body and living your life integrity is wrong.  By saying this we are saying that it is more important for you to conform to what society says is the norm than to have the pursuit of happiness that the rest of society seeks after. Oddly enough in many places there are currently anti-discrimination laws on the books covering a variety of groups and yet many places currently have or are placing laws on the books which actively obstruct the pursuit of happiness of LGBT people. Why is this? Why in a country where we value individual freedom do we concern ourselves with who a person wants to be and who they fall in love with? In the past we as Methodists have helped lead the charge on other civil rights issues like equality for women and the equality of all persons regardless of race or skin color. When will we as a Jesus loving, social gospel following people, stand up and begin to advocate for the right of LGBT people to pursue happiness?