Reconciling Ministries Network

5 Ways to Make a Reconciling Resolution for 2012

As the new year approaches, many people make resolutions or set goals for 2012. I want to suggest 5 ways to make a resolution that moves The United Methodist Church closer toward full inclusion for all God's children.

1. Prayers

Pray for a fully inclusive church. Pray for General Conference 2012, for the delegates to General Conference, and for the volunteers and staff who are headed to Tampa. Pray for the local church of which you are a part, wherever it may be in the reconciling process (or not). Pray for people you know who need to hear that God's love includes them. Pray for the IRD, the Good News Movement, and others who have different understandings of what the Gospel means. Remember that prayer means listening, too, and responding to what God calls all of us to do.  

2. Presence

Be present at the local church of which you are part. If you can, be present for local or conference-wide Reconciling events, or even General Conference. Be present for the people you know and whomever God might put in your path who needs a Reconciling friend.

3. Gifts

Consider making a gift to RMN. What a great way to honor someone who has touched your life! Perhaps you feel called to make RMN a regular part of your spiritual practice of tithing.

4. Service

RMN has a whole webpage devoted to explaining how to get involved in service! There's also a range of possibilities in the local church to which you relate. And don't forget the many ways to be of service in the micro-politics of everyday conversation and interaction.

5. Witness

Tell your story! Why are you a Reconciling United Methodist? Why does the full humanity off all God's children matter to you, and why is it important within The United Methodist Church? Whether you seek opportunities to share your story or simply welcome those that come along, be open to the movement of the Spirit as chances to offer a word of witness present themselves. 

 

What is your Reconciling Resolution?

 

Zero Tolerance Zones

by Rev. Troy Plummer, RMN Executive Director

Holidays with families of origin or families of choice are fraught with expectations—some positive and some less than positive. Will old habits continue or will new traditions replace them? Some of us simply choose not to go home because it just hurts too much. So even if it is important to mom and dad for me to go to their home church, I won’t. They were too unwelcoming to Walter and I one Christmas eve, and we have other options.

I’m thankful this season for laughter and tears caused by a sitcom—Glee. I’m particularly thankful that they have had a plot line on anti-gay bullying. Not just one episode that solves the problems of the world in an hour, but an open story line addressing the realities of bullying in school.

In the last episode, the gay guy, Kurt, chooses to escape the bully by moving to a private school with a zero tolerance policy on bullying. His newlywed parents forego their honeymoon to pay for his tuition—for his safety--when other options fall short. So, if you can afford it, you can find a zero tolerance zone? Too often those who really need the protection just don’t have these kinds of resources. The recent transgender day of remembrance drives the point home.

But it did make me wonder about these holidays and all the family pressure to be happy and what it might be like if they were all zero tolerance for bullying zones. And what if our denomination could suspend its anti gay policies to allow for such a zone in the church? The October PRRI/RNS News poll, conducted by Public Religion Research Institute in partnership with Religion News Service, found that two-thirds of Americans see connections between negative messages coming from places of worship about homosexuality and higher rates of suicide among gay and lesbian youth.

What if this Thanksgiving there was no extra expense required to be safe at home or in church? What if this Thanksgiving we didn’t have to light another candle in memory of one who couldn’t find a zero tolerance zone?

In my thanksgiving, I’ll keep a vision of just such a world alive in my heart. That would be something to be Glee-ful about.

---

Rev. Troy G. Plummer joined Reconciling Ministries Network as the executive director in November of 2003. RMN mobilizes United Methodists of all sexual orientations and gender identities to transform our Church and world into the full expression of Christ’s inclusive love. Troy organizes grassroots efforts coast-to-coast sharing an inclusive Gospel message. He coordinates biennial movement building convocations and provides leadership for LGBTQ equality through nonviolent witness and protest, legislative action, and coalition partnerships at the quadrennial General Conferences of the worldwide United Methodist Church. In 2007, he launched five-years of organizing campaigns to grow the movement.

Prior to RMN, Troy served for 13 years on the pastoral staff of Bering Memorial United Methodist Church in Houston, Texas. He directed Bering’s on-site counseling center for those affected by HIV/AIDS. Outside Bering’s sanctuary in 1999, he performed a “street wedding” for a lesbian couple celebrating 25 years together and facilitated Bering’s equal treatment of all couples policy. He also coordinated Bible Study, mission trips, retreats, and nonviolence training. Facing a bomb threat with 50 other couples, Troy and Walter, shared promises and rings on Freedom To Marry Day, February 12, 2003 for their 5th anniversary.

A Reconciling Prayer for Maundy Thursday

by Leland Spencer

O God of Holy Week,

On this day we remember the final meal that Jesus shared with those closest to Jesus.

We remember that Jesus gave thanks to You,

Then took an ordinary loaf of bread and ordinary wine from the fruit of the vine,

But shared the bread of life and cup of hope.

   

On this Holy Thursday, we give thanks to You

For loving each of us while we are yet sinners,

And offering each one peace and forgiveness.

And for loving the church while it is yet sinful,

And offering us collectively grace and mercy.

    

On this Holy Thursday, we present ourselves,

As ordinary as we are, and

Pray that you might make us be for the world the body of Christ,

Redeemed by Christ's love.

    

As we receive the bread of life and the cup of hope,

May we be transformed, and may we in turn

Transform the world as we live out what it means to be disciples,

Moved by the experience of This Holy Mystery, in which You give Yourself to us.

    

In Jesus' name, Amen.

76 Ash Wednesdays and 76 Lenten Seasons !

by Rev. Gilbert Caldwell

I have sought, with the assistance of the words attributed to Ellzabeth Kubler-Ross, "To live until I die".  I, like many of my colleagues ran some risk of life and limb as I participated in the southern and northern racial freedom movements. I like many of them have know arrest and detention. In my case because of my acts of civil disobedience at the headquarters of a national chain of Super Markets in 1971, protesting apartheid outside the South African Embassy in 1985 and protesting legislation of the United Methodist Church that punishes same gender loving clergy and those who perform unions of same gender loving persons; at the Cleveland General Conference in 2000.

All of the above flashed through my mind as I read the rich and powerful Ash Wednesday prayer of Leland G. Spencer, IV. At the end of this prayer, I read his brief biographical information and found out that he "withdrew from ministerial candidacy in the United Methodist Church because of its opposition to the ordination of LGBT persons".

It is because of this bit of his biographical information that I take the liberty of paraphrasing a portion of his prayer as a way to be in solidarity with Leland and to say that his prayer has become my prayer. This is how the inspiration of Leland shapes my prayer life as I begin my 76th Lenten Season:

Creator God, many, many times I have asked that you forgive the Methodist/United Methodist Church for its sins of racial exclusion and close-mindedness and hardness of heart. It did not exclude me from ordination because of my race, but it did make it necessary for me to begin my ministry in North Carolina in a racially segregated church, district, Conference and Central Jurisdiction. But although persons like myself were separated and segregated, we were on the "Methodist Bus", even though we had to sit in the back of that Bus. But today in 2010, there are persons who because of whom they love, are not even allowed on the "United Methodist Bus", and clergy who are on that "UM Bus" are penalized if they enable same gender persons to celebrate their love and commitment in a United Methodist Church.

God I was recently reading again those words of Dietrich Bonhoeffer that remind us that "we are all sinners and how foolish it is for self-acknowledged sinners to keep other sinners off of the Church Bus." (If Bonhoeffer is one of the angels now in heaven, please apologize to him on my behalf God, for my paraphrase of his words). God Creator, help all of us to acknowledge that an honest awareness of our imperfections makes us beggars. And that we are called to be "Beggars telling other beggars where the bread line is and that Jesus is passing out the bread."

Therefore God, I with your unordained but God-endorsed minister Leland, pray; "Continue to call your church to embrace the inclusive heart of its Creator." God you wrapped yourself in flesh and bones and came to us in the one called Jesus. 54 years ago when I was ordained a Deacon in the Methodist Church I would never have imagined that in 2010 I would have to join with Leland and pray that the United Methodist Church stop kicking people off the Bus because of sexual orientation and gender reasons. I thought that in 1968 when the denomination declared that I no longer had to sit in the back of the Bus, separation, segregation and exclusion were over. But since I was wrong, I pray that during the Lenten Season of 2010 some hearts will be warmed and some of the folk who have stood in the Church door to keep some folk out as Governor Wallace sought to keep some folk out of the University, will begin to pray and prepare for a United Methodist Church that is not afraid to be an authentically Open Church. Let the Church say, Amen and Amen.

---

The Rev. Gilbert H. Caldwell is a retired United Methodist Minister who lives in Asbury Park, N.J. He was active in the Massachusetts unit of the Southern Christian Leadership Conference (SCLC) and participated in the civil-rights movement throughout the nation. In 2000, he, with others, organized the RMN Extension ministry United Methodists of Color for a Fully Inclusive Church (UMOC), an organization committed to the full inclusion of LGBT people in every aspect of church and society. His recent book, Something Within: Works by Rev. Gilbert H. Caldwell is available from Church Within A Church.

A Reconciling Prayer for Ash Wednesday

by Leland Spencer

Oh God, on this Ash Wednesday, we reflect with contrition on our sin
And on the condition of Sin that separates us from you.
We grieve for our own sins of commission and omission, and
We grieve the sins of others that harm us.
Forgive us, and help us forgive others.

Forgive your Church for its sins of exclusion and close-mindedness and hardness of heart,
And continue to call your Church to embrace the inclusive heart of its Creator.
Forgive your Church for the pain it causes by ignorance, or by hate, whether well-intentioned or ill.
Bring healing to the wounds within the Church, and the wounds the Church has caused outside itself.
Forgive your Church for exiling some of your children,
And draw those children near to your nurturing bosom.

Forgive us, Oh God, in this movement, for our own self-righteousness,
For focusing so much on our oppression that we lose sight of our privilege,
For becoming oppressors even in the midst of emancipation work.
Forgive us for our judgmental attitudes, our own close-mindedness, and our resistance to dissent.
Help us to learn from those who disagree with us, even as we hope they will learn from us.

Oh God, on this day when we remember our mortality,
Help us to remember as well your grace.
Prepare us in heart, mind, soul, and body, as You
Guide us in this season of Lent toward the promise of resurrection.

---

Leland G. Spencer IV, a lifelong United Methodist, is a PhD student in the department of speech communication at the University of Georgia, where he researches religious rhetoric as it intersects with gender and sexuality. Leland holds an M.A. in Communication from the University of Cincinnati (2009). While in Cincinnati, Leland served as the worship intern at the Wesley Foundation. Leland served as a part-time local pastor at Mapleton United Methodist Church in the East Ohio Conference from 2005 until 2007 when Leland withdrew from the candidacy process because of the United Methodist Church's exclusive position about the ordination of LGBT persons.

What Was Your Epiphany?

by James Dalton

Yesterday was Epiphany in which we celebrate the in-breaking of God into human history through the life of Jesus Christ. In Western Christianity we celebrate the discovery of Jesus by the Magi.  In some Eastern Christian traditions Epiphany is the celebration of Jesus' baptism in the Jordan River. As I thought about the meaning of Epiphany through the story of the Magi's I found it odd to whom God decided to reveal the birth of Jesus.  It would seem logical that God would choose to deliver this discovery to the religious leaders or maybe even some devout person who has dedicated their life to prayer and to the study of the religious texts.  Instead we are told that God chose the Magi.

As a children I was taught that the Magi were "three wise men" of seemingly well to-do stature and knowledge.  Who after riding a few days on camel arrived at the "lowly manager".  Upon presentation of their gifts of gold, frankincense, and myrrh they broke out into a melodic rendition of "We Three Kings." (And if you've always wondered what myrrh was, it is an incense or oil that was typically used in burial rituals.  Great birthday gift, huh?)  After doing a little research I found that this description might not be entirely accurate.  According to some the Magi were a Priestly caste from Zoroastrianism, a religion based on the teachings of the prophet Zoroaster, who were said to have the ability to read the stars and the fate that they foretold.

"So what? Does it really change anything?" some might say. In regards to the life and divinity of Jesus? Not so much. But it does, at least for me, change how I view God.  Many of us have grown up in or have been exposed to churches that maintain a belief that God only reveals truth to an elect few.  Some have been told that God only chooses those who are are of up-right stature, who go to church every Sunday, who have read the Bible cover-to-cover, or who can quote the ABC's of Salvation. These, of course, are God's favorites and to whom truth would be revealed, right? This doesn't really add up when you consider God's decision to announce Jesus birth to the Magi.

On the first day of Jesus' birth we are shown that God is doing something new and different.  Instead of revealing the birth of Jesus to the Pharisees or Sadducees, God chose outsiders. God chose a group of astrologists from a neighboring religion, whose testimony of the event would not have meant much to the temple leaders and religious leaders. God chose a group of people who would not have been allowed into the temple because of who they were.  From the very beginning of Jesus' life God was announcing that though the doors to the Kingdom had been made narrow allowing only a few to pass through, Jesus had come to break open the gates.  Jesus had come to preach good news to the poor,to proclaim freedom for the prisoners and recovery of sight for the blind, to release the oppressed, to proclaim the year of the Lord's favor.  God was not only announcing the birth of Jesus but the beginning of a new way.  God was announcing that although you were formerly outsiders you are now accepted. This, for me, was my Epiphany.  What was yours?

---

James Dalton is the Communications / Technology Coordinator at Reconciling Ministries Network.  He is currently finishing his Masters in Social Justice from Loyola University Chicago's Institute of Pastoral Studies.  He has Bachelors in Photography from Columbia College Chicago. 

New Year's Revolutions

by Leland Spencer

A few years ago, I had a conversation with a great friend. I love talking with this friend because he always challenges me, yet he does so in a polite, civilized, respectful manner, and he actually does it for the sake of dialogue, not for the opportunity to prove me wrong or something like that. He really values what I have to say in response to his challenges, and that’s why he does it; it’s definitely refreshing to talk with him. We were talking about faith this particular day, and he said something I’ll never forget: “The problem with Christianity is that it has lost its revolutionary feel.”  The problem with Christianity is that it has lost its revolutionary feel.

My friends, Jesus was a revolutionary. The early Christian movement was revolutionary. Throughout history, Christianity has often been revolutionary. Can we say the same about the body of Christ today? Can we say the same about our own faith and the way we live it out, individually and collectively? Am I revolutionary? Are you revolutionary? Is the congregation you attend revolutionary? Is our denomination revolutionary? Is the body of Christ revolutionary in this twenty-first century? Is my friend right; has the church lost its revolutionary feel? I’m challenged by these questions, in part because, at least in some cases, I see such a striking difference between what the answers are and what the answers ought to be. We’re called to be revolutionary.

I've never been good at keeping New Year's resolutions, so instead of a New Year's resolution, how can we work on having a New Year's revolution?

---

Leland G. Spencer IV, a lifelong United Methodist, is a PhD student in the department of speech communication at the University of Georgia, where he researches religious rhetoric as it intersects with gender and sexuality. Leland holds an M.A. in Communication from the University of Cincinnati (2009). While in Cincinnati, Leland served as the worship intern at the Wesley Foundation. Leland served as a part-time local pastor at Mapleton United Methodist Church in the East Ohio Conference from 2005 until 2007 when Leland withdrew from the candidacy process because of the United Methodist Church's exclusive position about the ordination of LGBT persons.

Comfort

by Violet Fenn

Advent and Christmas has always been my favorite time of year. My favorite part of the four weeks is the performance of Handel’s Messiah that I attend annually. The Christmas portion begins with an overture and then a beautiful tenor aria that starts with text from the 40th chapter of Isaiah: “Comfort, O comfort my people, says your God.” This incredible verse speaks volumes and has spoken the loudest to me this year.

In a recent sermon, the senior minister at the church I attend said: “Friends are sometimes God’s apology for your family.” Many people can relate, but to the LGBTQ community it has particular meaning. When our parents, siblings, aunts, uncles, grandparents and other blood relatives hear the news from us that we are lesbian, gay, bisexual or queer, the reaction is not always what we expect. There is often shock, anger and judgment. So when we are rejected by our families, we turn to others in the LGBTQ community who can relate. We can also turn to others who are our allies. Not only can we turn to others, we can turn to God. To some, this seems like a contradictory statement. We who are Reconciling know differently. We can turn to the one who created us exactly like we are.

This Advent, those words from Isaiah have a new meaning for me. I take comfort in knowing that Christ is present but I also take comfort in knowing that God is with me despite the heartache I experienced when much of my family rejected me. We in the Reconciling movement who are lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender or queer can take comfort knowing that when we are open and accepting of ourselves, God is pleased even though our families may not be.

If this Advent seems to be lonelier without family, we can look to the family we choose: friends. We can also look to God, the friend we all have. Take comfort in that.

---

Violet Fenn, a United Methodist for 5 years, is a senior at Northeastern State University in Broken Arrow, OK majoring in English with a minor in Psychology. Violet became involved with RMN in April after attending a Call to Witness training. She is now part of leadership with MOSAIC as well as its TransJustice work group.

A Reconciling Prayer of/for Thanksgiving

by Leland Spencer

We give thanks, O God, for the cornucopia of this season,
For its many colors, its many vegetables, its many fruits (!),
For the plenty it represents, and for the fullness and wholeness you give.

We give thanks, O God, for the cornucopia of this movement,
For its many congregations, communities, and campus ministries,
For the richness of reconciling conversations and reconciling relationships.

We give thanks O God, for the cornucopia of opportunity,
For all that lies behind and all that lies ahead,
For the diversity of gifts among us, and the diversity of the challenges that face us.

We give thanks O God, for Your cornucopia of presence,
For strength to help us endure,
For grace that is sufficient for all things.

Amen.

What to Do When Your Pie Don't Love You

Dr. Pamela Lightsey

Friends, this one is just for your holiday joy!

---------------------------

I have just returned home from washing a ton of clothes.  Ordinarily, the day before Thanksgiving I would be busy preparing a down-home Southern feast.  But oh no!  This year I decided not to cook but instead to buy my vittles.  Right now I could be enjoying a pre-Thanksgiving treat, delighting myself in the fact that I have clean underwear to last until next year.  That alone would be worth a slice of sweet potato pie with a nicely chilled glass of Bailey's liqueur.  But none of that this year!  You see that monstrosity to the left is a hoax dressed up in tin pie pan clothing.  Hmmph!  I should have taken the wrapping off the box and looked at this impostor before I took her out the bakery.  Any connoisseur of sweet potato pie could look at her and tell she is a cheap impression.  Hell, all dimpled up like that!  A true sweet potato pie would have a richly earthly appearance.  The spices of cinnamon and nutmeg would be clearly noticeable yet blending into the color and tone of the authentic dessert.  When you sample a piece of real sweet potato pie, you tongue almost wants to reach out and slap your face as if the pie is speaking and demanding, "Say my name.  Go 'head, say my name!"  Instead, I bit off into something that had the texture of wet bread.  Uugh!  Lord help me, I'll eat peanut butter and jelly tomorrow before I spend another penny on faux-Thanksgiving fixings!  At least I have my gin and juice...